Bachelorette
Bachelorette

Episode Report Card
Daniel: F | 231 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Whalin' on Kalon

The go to The Lorry and the Treacle or The Pram and the Bobby or some such pub, where they order a couple of pints and some fish and chips, and "Jef" tells Emily that he was sitting there when Kalon spouted off his shit. "Jef," presenting facts not in evidence, tells Emily that he asked Kalon if he thought he was being fair, and maybe Kalon should leave. Again: facts not in evidence. They talk a little bit more about what a loser Kalon is, and "Jef" says if Ricki's baggage, then she's a Chloe handbag that he'll have forever, and instead of cocking an eyebrow and pursuing a different line of conversation, Emily corrects him to "vintage Louis Vuitton."

Emily feels good that "Jef" stood up for her, even though yesterday she was pissed that no one said anything. And now we're getting to it: she feels an attraction to "Jef," but she's not sure it's reciprocated, and she needs him to show her (that he wants to make sex on her).

Then it's time for dessert on the London Eye (kinda wish they'd stuck around with the etiquette teacher long enough for her to suggest to Emily that she needn't respond to ever second statement with, "Right?" or "I know, right?"). As the truly amazing London Eye rotates, "Jef" asks Emily where she sees herself a year from now, Emily says she hopes she has a boyfriend or a fiancé or a husband or something, which ought to shut up anyone who thinks Emily has no ambition. "That'd be pretty cool, instead of always being the single girl," she says, and the smile vanishes for a split-second and Emily looks genuinely sad. "Jef" toasts to "not always being the single girl" to which Emily responds: "I know, right?"

She finally blurts out that she's questioning whether he's actually into her or not. She's feeling low because of last night, and now here she is with someone who doesn't show any outward signs of wanting to have sex with her, which is confusing and scary for her, apparently.

He starts slathering on the praise (surprisingly, Emily's into that!), and he talks to us about the connection they have, and he wants her to know how much he likes her. That seems to mean he haltingly stammers stuff about how he feels he can tell her anything, and he's all about finding the right person to spend his life with. She asks if she and a six-year-old moved to Salt Lake (but Emily, what about your career? Ha ha, I couldn't keep a straight face for that) would it mean the party's over? He smartly says the party would just be getting started, and Emily flops onto her back and starts purring.

Bachelorette

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