Bachelorette
Season 8, Episode 6

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12 Simple Rules for Dating An Adult Ryan

Cocktail party time! The guys discuss the unprecedented move of eliminating two guys via one-on-one dates in one week. Emily tells us she would be "so blessed" to wind up with any of these guys, but Doug and John are on the bubble for her tonight, especially John, since he's always so guarded.

Which of course means that we'll see the opposite. John has an ace up his sleeve in the form of the funeral cards of his grandparents, which he carries around with him in his wallet, and he gets the right amount of choked up as he talks about his grandparents' funeral cards and how he feels his grandfather is his guardian angel. The cynic in me feels like he's playing things up a bit.

As for Doug, he's being so awkward with Emily that she has to basically force him to skootch over next to her, and she reminds him that because she's a girl, she likes to be pursued. Apparently he has earned the nickname "Humble Doug," which she says is great, but she'd rather have the nickname "Confident Doug." That's a little too close to Ryan's nickname, "Confident Douche," really. Their conversation leaves him feeling more unsure than before. And now he's crying about missing his son, and that seems more genuine to me than the sudden appearance of grandparent funeral cards.

After some time-wasting shots of Emily looking at pictures of the remaining dingbats, we finally get to the rose ceremony. Emily babbles about not being a hundred percent confident in her decision. Well, that should reassure everyone!

First up, Sean. Then "Jef." Then Arie. That means it's just John and Doug left for the final rose. She picks it up, and then without saying a word, turns and walks out, to everyone's consternation. Of course, they haven't repeatedly been shown the clip of Emily seeking out Chris Harrison, hanging out by some castle wall somewhere. She tells him she doesn't know what to do. Ooh, such manufactured drama!

Chris tells her he's told her there are no rules here -- yeah, no kidding. "Doug and John? You're sure?" he says, and she nods, and he takes the rose from her and asks if she wants to talk to the guys.

She goes back in, seeming upset. She apologizes to John and Doug, because she was second-guessing her decision and realized she couldn't hand out the final rose. That's when Harrison comes in with a tray that has two roses on it. Not really a surprise, given the heavyhanded way it was made to look like she wanted to ditch both of them. "I just don't want to make any mistakes," she tells us. Well, why not just give roses to everybody every single week? That way, you wouldn't end ANY potentially rewarding relationship!

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