Season 8, The Men Tell All

Episode Report Card
Daniel: F | Grade It Now!
Confidence Men

God, we're not done yet? Chris is up next. "I don't want to," he jokes, and Harrison thanks him for starting this off on a weird note. The montage starts, and Chris in the picture-in-picture watching himself is about as intense as you'd imagine. After it's done, he talks about how it still hurts (judging by what we saw of him in the Syphilis Pad promos, he gets over it). He says he loved Emily 110 percent, which is why he got overly emotional sometimes.

Harrison asks him if he angers quickly, and Chris says if he believes in something, he'll do everything in the world to fight for it, which is one of those things people like to believe about themselves but is actually bullshit. And he alludes to losing some good friends because of his willingness to tell it like it is, or whatever. At no point is he making a case for the maturity of the 25-year-old, though. And now Harrison asks him about Gonorrhea Pad and Chris says he hopes everyone tunes in because it's "unbelievable."

And now Chris Harrison says that everywhere he goes, he's asked why Sean wasn't in the final two. He doesn't say anything about how sad this makes him for America, but it does mean that Sean's next up for the hot seat. People who inexplicably seem to actually give a shit about Sean and Emily cheer and clap and then get deathly quiet when we watch his supposedly emotional exit. He himself doesn't seem quite over it yet, and some dingbat in the audience wipes away a tear, like CALL A FAMILY MEMBER OF YOUR OWN, FOR GOD'S SAKE.

Sean says his rejection took him by surprise, because he'd started to think of himself as a father to Ricki and husband to Emily. "No one wants to feel inadequate in any way, and that's the emotion that pops up," he says. Harrison says it seems like the emotions are still there. Sean says Emily's an amazing person, and the feelings aren't going to fade overnight. They talk for another five hours, and Sean wants a family and he's more open now than he's ever been, and he hopes she comes around sooner or later, and Harrison calls him "buddy" which is a step up from "man" in the Harrison Man-Affection Scale.

And then Emily herself comes out, to a standing ovation from all the guys she sent home, like HAVE SOME DIGNITY, and Harrison asks if it's tough for her to walk out, and you think he's talking about the skintight dress she's got on, but it's because she sees Sean with whom she had an emotional goodbye. She tells him that she had an ugly cry when she watched that episode and tells him everything she felt was real. That would be really lovely for "Jef" and/or Arie to hear at this point, I imagine. And of course just like the night it happened, Emily seems to be thinking about how awful her dumping of Sean was mainly because of how hard it was for her.

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