Good god, woman, I thought y'all were going to get in the hot tub. Cut to Trista fully submerged in the hot, cleansing water, while Ryan sits on the ledge behind her. He dares to dip one toe in the pool while planting the seeds for the inevitable "I hate you, you bitch" heartbreak poem that will come after his ouster, quietly wondering what rhymes with "this little piggy...is the only thing in the hot tub." Too bad it's going to be so hard for him to grow those seeds when he's not allowed anywhere near the water. And so, Shirtless Ryan -- so far my very, very, very favorite Ryan of all -- speaks through the blue lips of one sitting near naked, outdoors, in the Pacific Northwest, in October, telling Trista, "I hope that you know how I feel about you." Compensating for the loud, water-spraying jets, Trista cranes her neck back to read his lips in an exceedingly I'm-sorry-it's- so-hard-for-me- to-hear-you- over-all-of- your-not-pleasure kind of way, responding, "I do." Too bad that's the last time you'll ever hear her say those words, oh ye silver medallist of her heart. But don't count Ryan out just yet: he's learned a lot more words and he's eager to say them all out loud, in a row! "It's frustrating, 'cause I don't, like, get to talk to you and feel, like, how you're feeling." He adds that "at this last Rose Ceremony," he was "on Cloud Nine," but was disheartened to see that the other guys all came downstairs glowing after their own private conversations with Trista. There's even a gauzy montage of it, each of the guys walking back into The Room With The Rug, looking very smug. When Charlie comes into the room, he even winks at the camera, and a thousand slugs follow in his wake on the trail of slime he seems to leave behind. Ryan wonders, "Shoot. Maybe it's just how she is." Awwww! He said "shoot"! Let him get in there! Look at how cold he is! He could cut glass with those things!
Oh, but what Ryan says next is much, much better. Trista sits on the edge of the now-empty hot tub as well (what is the matter with you people?), and as they begin smooching, Rhymin' unironically lets us know, "Seeing Trista in the hot tub, it's actually kind of hard...and sometimes, if we're kissing, or if she kisses me or something, that makes it even harder." Tee hee! Raise your hand if you're five! Last one into the empty hot tub is...the only person in the hot tub! Trista pulls away and cackles nervously as Rhymin' asserts his need for a "cold shower or something" and Trista insincerely agrees, "Yeah, me too." Come to think of it, that "Stock Footage Film Festival" blitz of the Space Needle that kicked off this episode is starting to seem more intuitive than ever.