Bands on the Run
New Orleans

Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: C+ | Grade It Now!
The Big Cheesy

Amanda doesn't feel like doing it at all. "Playing to a bunch of drunk, white, male tourists...I just didn't feel up to that sort of humiliation." Um, whatever. It's money and free booze. Just try for once, dammit! Chimene: "The whole 'equipment moving' thing is a real pain in the ass." What? That is such a lazy-ass thing to say. My god, you are in a band. Moving equipment is part of the job. Buck up, camper!

Over at Razzoo, Brandin and AP are shooting the shit. Brandin: "HARLOW isn't coming." AP: "Why not?" Brandin: "I think they got something else lined up." AP: "Once I heard 'free drinks,' I knew you guys would be all over it." Brandin gives him the "yeah, okay, you got me: we like to drink, you butthole, you reek like a septic tank" look, which makes me nearly pee myself. Awesome.

Okay, so the bands have to persuade a stranger to give them some Mardi Gras beads, and they have to hang them on the door of 232 Bourbon Street. First band wins performance blah blah blah.

Dominic gets some beads, but naturally, he's already wasted so he starts running in circles. Bob: "I heard some screaming and I look over and I see Dominic with some beads in his hands running down the street, and I'm like, 'Shit.'" Bob, don't shut up. Just die. Can't you let them have just one stinking break? You're beating them by well over $1200. You can't just show a little mercy and lighten up and enjoy yourself? You're such a dick. Dicky McDickdick. Dicker O'Dickegan. Bob, I've said a few times, and I'll say it again. You. Smell. Like. Poo. You are poo, Bob.

Beastie: "I showed my tits to some ladies and they threw some beads down. I have a pretty nice rack." Again with the funniness, Beastie. You see, the funny thing is that Beastie doesn't really have mammaries, but that's what makes the joke, completes the cycle! It's truly incredible, better than Cats. Not. I never saw Cats. ["I did. And I never saw this episode, but that little anecdote there that you just wrote was miles better than Cats." -- Wing Chun]

Anyway, Bob gets the beads, and because he's such a competitive little jerk, he sprints and beats Dominic by a hair. Not. That really sucks. SOULCRACKER should go to hell. Except Sutton. And I guess Ramsey, even though his silence sometimes makes him seem slightly evil. I don't even know what I'm talking about. Oh, yeah. Shut up, Bob. Funny scene, though, just because you get to watch the boom guy running after Dominic as fast as he can.

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Bands on the Run




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