Bands on the Run
The Reunion Show

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: A+ | Grade It Now!
Best. Reunion Show. Ever.

Fastball plays, Sutton says he likes them, and as they hang by the port-a-potties, Josh says he thinks that Fastball is "generic." Then Beastie emerges from a potty with beer in hand, and Josh hops off the ground, and they all three skip off together to get drunk. Boob in particular gets really wasted. His hair has grown out since the show was taped, and Sars in particular thinks he looks yummy. But what about Brandin, Sars? You heartbreaking hussy, you. ["I've got enough love to go around." -- Sars] Bob hugs Dom drunkenly and declares his love. Hee! How excellent that this drunken admission is on TV. Bob asks Adrian to make out with him. Adrian says she's not afraid to make out in front of the cameras. Okay, then, lips for kissing only. But of course they have to talk about it. She asks if he randomly hooks up with people he doesn't know, and he says kissing isn't hooking up. And guess what else, you college-educated young people? Talking isn't making out either. Get with the lip-on-lip action. I never thought I'd ever be nostalgic for footage of Dom sucking face, but look at me. These drunken, lustful hotties are WASTING BREATH when they should be just coming up for it. Bob says he used to kiss his dad before he went to sleep, and Adrian asks for a sample. She gets a cheek peck. Oh, Jesus H. Christ on his throne. Then Bob asks if she wants to see how he kissed his mom. Wham. They go at it. To be fair, Bob is so drunk he's beyond even a soft-on, but Adrian? Is into it, man. They. Suck. Face. Sars, I can hear your teeth grinding even from here. ["Shut up, woman." -- Sars] They break away and Adrian is like, no way do you kiss your mom like that! Then Adrian's sassy friend dares her to kiss Bob again, and Adrian is not the kind of gal to back down when dared. So she HAD to kiss him, Sars, okay? She HAD to. Finally they break for air, and Adrian says she LOVES it, and her friend drags her away, "undare-ing" her. Bob says they're "going to screw like mad minxes." Ha ha! You wish.

Back on the FLICKERSTICK relationship therapy couch, Fletcher reveals that he finally told Angela about his tour, um, adventures. Her initial reaction was "get out." Then, she decided she wanted to try and keep the family together. Aw! Then Dom says in an interview that when you're in a band, "it's impossible to be in a relationship until you're completely successful, because you're going to do what you have to do to make it." What? So if you're in a band, you're going to have to screw other people? To "make it"? And whatever does "completely successful" consist of? Someone smack Dom for me.

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Bands on the Run




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