Bands on the Run
The Reunion Show

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Best. Reunion Show. Ever.

Rex goes a little nuts after the show at Stubb's. His wife shows up, surprising him. They had a fight beforehand. He avoids the cameras in a panic. Then, while locked behind a door, he has a deeply agitated conversation with an unknown woman about his failing relationship. This shit right here kills me. It's the break-up conversation you have with yourself each time you break up with someone, but this is out loud, and on tape, and on television. Here's an excerpt: "I want to feel passionate about somebody again. And I don't feel passionate about her anymore. Why do you need that partner, why do you need it? That's my question. There's no homefront to hold down. I just miss being in love with someone. You hurt when you're in love with someone." The woman he's talking with asks if the person in HARLOW that he's intrigued with will stand by him. We see a couple of scenes of Rex and Rayshele being comfortable with each other. Then Fletcher leads Rex back to the hotel, with Rex asking where Rayshele's room is, and to help him, and to bring the therapy on. The segment ends with an off-camera voice asking if "we should talk about Rayshele" and Rex saying no. Well, then.

Lights up on the Marriott pool, in Austin. A pink-bikini-ed Adrian romps with the SOULSPATTER boys. She says it's fun to be around them because they're "intellectual." HA HA HA HA HA! Wow, the uptight brigade just got their female back-up singer. Adrian scampers across the tile floor to Sutton, who tells he that he didn't "fuck any chicks or do any drugs" while on tour and is afraid of looking boring on TV. Don't worry -- you only looked like an ass. Adrian says she did the same thing and "regret[s] every second of it." So go chow some box and get it out of your system! I thought it was the HARLOW girls that brought out your "animalistic side"? Get a move on! Then Bob takes his nuts out and buoys them up to the surface, yelling "WHOA!" when they emerge. How very intellectual. Sutton does the same thing, and gets busted by pool security. He says, "This is nuts, but I have to go." Oh, ha ha.

The bands are assembled, and are forced to watch themselves on TV. This was a great idea. Everyone is excited to see themselves, and to laugh at themselves, and to give the finger to the person sitting on the couch a few feet away for slagging them on tape. Everyone takes it well and cracks up. Until Corey says he hates Dom. Dom slaps Corey on the back, but later on says that he was hurt by that. Hey, Dom has feelings, y'all. Don't forget. And his feelings are most sensitive in an area located south of his belt. Remember that, too! Brandin points out that the difference between BOTR and The Real World is that the bands have to stay together and be a close unit after the show is done taping. In the Real World, it's just see ya until the next weak-ass reunion show!

The SPOOLSPOONER segment shows them working super hard and flyering up a storm, only to have the FLICK boys pull their posters down. Apey says that's "an unspoken thing between bands" that you just don't do. No, it isn't! Then Corey says "SOULCRACKER sucks because they suck!" Ba Ba Beastie says that "validates" SOUPSLURPER to him. Oh, my GOD. Never part your hair in the middle, and SHUT UP.

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Bands on the Run

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