Bates Motel

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 52 USERS: A+
The Possum Symphony
Emma: "That is such a relief!"
Cupcake: "Oh is it?"
Emma: "Yeah. Anyway, you're all checked in and everything?"
Cupcake: "Yeah, you did it last night. Right before barfing. It was adorable."
Emma: "Sorry!"
Cupcake: "I'm going to be around, though. Selling pot for the summer."
Emma: "Cool, well, you have fun with that, and thanks for looking out for me."
Cupcake: "I don't know how else to impress upon you that it is not a problem."


Peter likes being the alpha, at the head of the table, going on and on about his wife's spending habits before settling on the new Costco opening up.

Christine: "He's obsessed. Costco appeals to his hunter-gatherer instincts."
Peter: "Right out by the new bypass road! A retail corridor is just what this town needs."
Norma: "Not what I need, though. It's going to ruin my life, ha ha!"
Christine: "Honey, you have boutique appeal. Plenty of tourists will want to come into town the old way..."
Peter: "Liar! Condescender! Remember Route 66?"
Christine: "Seriously shut the hell up. This chick is 98% ready to unravel on a good day."
Peter: "Face the day bravely, that's what I say!"
Norma: "Can't blame a guy for getting exciting about buying in bulk. If you'll excuse me for a moment, I have to have about sixty seconds of a mental breakdown in the powder room."

George: "So now you know our dirty little secret. Peter is fucking awful."
Norma: "It's totally fine! Being forced into society by your sister means biting my tongue. A thing I literally just learned I can do."
George: "If somebody was making jokes about my precarious small-business life dreams, I would scream into a hand towel in the bathroom too. Let's go get some crème brûlée down your neck, what do you say?"


"You gotta show 'em you're serious. My family is trash, just complete garbage, so I have tons of experience. My aunt's ex was a prick, wouldn't pay alimony, so my grandma hit 'im with a baseball bat and guess what? Paid right up."

She hands Norman a tire iron -- scooped out from under the seats as she weaves down the road, startling him into mania -- and explains that it is now his superpower.


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Bates Motel




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