Battlestar Galactica
Battlestar Galactica

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B | 816 USERS: C+
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Looking Up At The Admiral

41,398 souls in the Fleet, but 90% of the loss was Sagittaron, so who gives a fuck? Am I right? Adama walks on river stones, back on Old Caprica, looking at his son's toys and thinking about his children. The ones he forgot and the ones he failed, and the ones he can't stop saving. "Leeson takes first watch. Leeson takes first watch. Kinsey checks the roster. Kinsey checks the roster. Jaffee brings me coffee. Jaffee brings me coffee." Carolanne's amused that he's still doing his memory exercises; still jealous of the war. "Do you really think they expect you to know all of their names?" More embarrassing exposition and then: "Now hurry, you're going to be late meeting Laura."

As he walks down the corridor, Carolanne wonders aloud if she, Laura, possibly has a "thing for bad boys": "She wouldn't be the first." I don't know what that has to do with anything, unless he's being "bad" in some way I cannot identify, or there's about to be a return to the whole Laura/Zarek/Bill/Saul thing that always seems poised to take over when New Caprica comes up, which would be hot in certain ways, I guess, if a little too Primal Scene for yours truly. Adama shushes Carolanne, back in the old house for a moment: "She's the President of the Twelve Colonies." Carolanne -- and I don't want to be too hard on the acting, honestly, because she does freak-out really well, but mostly, this dialogue is screaming-meemie bad -- "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, of course. Since you've created one godlike facade for yourself, why not invent another one for her?" I don't know, Adama's nuts. I can imagine that he actually thinks in these bombastic, over-explanatory Star Trek sentences, but it's really jarring to hear this stuff on this show. "It's another excuse to keep your distance," Carolanne helpfully voices over further, just so we're all on the same page. That page being huge and made of posterboard, with CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT written on it in bright highlighter letters, with glitter and gems pasted all over it, and a picture of a unicorn being ridden by a very frowny William Adama, and a hot dog flying into a giant crack in the side of a mountain, and a stick figure of everybody's mommy hitting them. Everybody in the whole world.

Battlestar Galactica

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