On the real Colonial One, Roslin's meeting with Zarek. (How awesome if she got some play right now, except there's no way to edit it that the sexless fanboys wouldn't be like, "Apparently this episode is about how Laura Roslin is a whore." Just like with the miniseries.) They discuss the new Quorum of Twelve, which will be sworn in in three days, and Zarek exposits how as President, he'll nominate her as VP, they'll confirm her, and then he'll resign. "The whole thing should take less than an hour." I was going to say she should pay, and learn a little something about consequences, but then I think about the last year and it just feels nasty to say. Tacky. She'll fuck up gloriously in no time, I'm sure, but I don't really feel like she needs to earn this. "You're stepping down without a fight? Means Tom Zarek wants something. So why don't you put your cards on the table and let's see if it's a price that I'm willing to pay." (He's like, "The price is that hot ass!" and then they make out... In five, four, come on, three... Nope, not happening. Why won't this ring grant my wishes anymore?) Zarek calls himself a realist -- because one thing activists and terrorists are willing to accept is political reality -- and admits he knew he wouldn't be in office long one way or the other. "And the Admiral's made it quite clear that he'd like nothing better than to put me in a cell if I try to hang on to power." Roslin calls this Tigh-style coup "a favor," since it's Bill and not Saul, and explains how her brain worked that out: "You and I both know how impossible it would be to govern this Fleet without the backing of the military." Um. If the government isn't backed by its military, you have what's called South America. It goes poorly. I want Laura to be President again, because I fear change, but like: man up, Bill. You could play with Tom too. "Even so, I want to be included in the new government. I don't wanna be on the outside looking in anymore." Maybe Tom can learn something about politics after all. "Okay, okay. You stood up to Baltar on New Caprica, you nearly lost your life for your trouble. This Fleet needs that kind of courage. The vice presidency is yours if you want it, Tom." They shake hands, laughing. He's going to fuck this up, watch.
Galactica CIC: sparks still flying, but this time it's because of a soldering gun and not being shot all over the place and nearly killed. Gaeta enters in civvies and Tigh is on him with a quickness. "You gotta be kidding! Who gave this man permission to enter the CIC?" Helo tells him it was Adama: "Communications took some serious hits during the rescue, and Mr. Gaeta's offered to help with the repairs." Tigh freaks out about how Gaeta is a turncoat and collaborator and contributed to the deaths of thousands, but yet: "The old man needs his phones fixed, and suddenly, all is forgiven." Helo tries to do his Helo thing: "Cylons find us, we're gonna need every hand we've got." Tigh's like, they totally did already? "The Cylons found us, Mr. Agathon." (Watch very carefully whenever a New Caprican interacts with somebody who stayed with the Fleet during the occupation. I have this feeling that the whole conflict is going to be central, like maybe civil war central, and sooner rather than later. I don't blame them, though: the New Caprica survivors have like no sense of humor about anything.) "Your friend Gaeta was on the welcoming committee." He gets right the hell in Gaeta's face: "Hey! Look at me. Long as you're here, maybe you can help me out. I'm missing something. I lost it in detention. Since you're so buddy-buddy with the Cylons, maybe you know where it is? How 'bout it?" There's spit coming out. "Do you know where my eye is?" Damn. Adama comes in shouting Saul's name, and he barks orders at the crew before dragging Saul off for a little talk. Saul stumbles. It wasn't just his eye they took, and worse: they didn't make him cut out his own eye. It was the resistance that did that.
"They have a lot of work in the next couple of weeks. I need you to get some sleep. Get rested and get ready, all right?" Tigh tells him he's fine, and screams back into CIC: "And you can tell that toaster-lover over there that I am still the XO of this ship!" Adama realizes it's not getting better without coffee and a shower, and lays hands on his friend. "Let's go." Tigh struggles, and Bill's finally like, "You're embarrassing yourself, Saul." That's the Tigh I'm used to! "You're the one that should be embarrassed. Letting one of Baltar's henchman walk around like nothing's happened... " Adama officially orders him to go sleep it off, and Tigh gets poetic again: "Oh, yeah. Just go to sleep. Forget about it all, just forget about everything. Well, I'm not forgetting. I'm not gonna forget." Tigh slumps off for another drink or something, and Gaeta is very damned sad. (I kind of feel like, collaborator or not, Gaeta's still got some moral cred for the time he stopped Tigh from stealing the election, you know? Although that went not so well.)