Battlestar Galactica

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C | 19 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
When Will The Work Be Done?

Hera wanders through soundless war, past bodies and gunfire, climbing through the small places, past the sparks and gunfire, past Marines in position, past last defenses, as the lights flash. Laura heads past a Marine going the other way, barely standing. Cavil comes around with Centurions at his back, walking through gunfire, forcing the Marines to give up position after position, falling back before him. Laura's nearly stumbling; it's painful to walk. Suddenly, she spots Hera and they rush into each other's arms; she ducks behind another stack of crates with the girl and waits for Cavil's squad to pass. It's actually very suspenseful and scary, I'd forgotten. And when they're gone, she looks around, and Hera has disappeared once again.

Gaius and Caprica make their way through a hatch, and into one room, and then the next. He checks his gun, and he's all out. Caprica's got two rounds. And in the corner of the room, coincidentally: Hera, holding her hands over her ears. Laura and Athena meet at a junction, terrified as it comes true around them, and keep running in their separate nightmares. Caprica kneels to Hera as the women run down their stairs, and see her bending down. They are both so much more broken than in the vision. Caprica and Gaius make their way through another hatch, just as Athena and Laura converge outside, only to find it locked. Athena shouts her name, again and again.

Gaius was so beautiful, bloody and filthy, on Kobol, the first time he saw the Opera House. He stared around, twirled on a heel. They walk through the hatch now and his jaw drops, as the wonderful "Passacaglia" starts. "I've been here before," he says, and Caprica nods, staring around at the beauty all around them. Gaius blinks in the sudden light: they're supposed to...? Caprica smiles. "Go into the Opera House." She hands him the child, in the vision, and they head down the aisle toward the stage; on Galactica, she's got the gun as he cradles the child in his arms. Their baby, born in the brig.

(Except, hold up. I can handle the fighting and whatever, because Lee's hair looks fantastic and Caprica with a gun pushes buttons I didn't know I had, but let's review. The visions that have been appearing regularly for over half the series, that have provided meaning and context for half the characters on the show, that have provided what little female-female bonding and connection the show affords us, the visions that got Natalie killed... Amount to what, exactly? A dress rehearsal of a déjà vu, in which two women walk down a hallway and a third woman picks up a child and walks, conservatively, six yards, with zero danger anywhere nearby. This is the prosaic destiny that enfolds Caprica, Athena, Laura and Hera? And Gaius? To go down a hallway. Chip's Challenge indeed, motherfucker. It takes five people, Cylon projection, two Angels, two to four Moms, and a hallucinogenic folk remedy to bring this miraculous vision to bear? That is some weak sauce. It's basic storytelling to fulfill something this large and trumped-up with something worthwhile. If that's the shit God really needs you to know, then God is pretty much retarded.

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Battlestar Galactica

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