Battlestar Galactica
Lay Down Your Burdens, Part I

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | Grade It Now!
A Stupidly Tilting Planet

The Raptors are getting ready for the last jump (10 - n), and Starbuck warns them that they have no idea of the conditions so they should be ready for anything. She asks if Sharon's ready, and Sharon nods, then looks Starbuck in the eyes: "Ready." They jump, and we actually follow a Raptor through jump, which is basically a jump-cut from space to the golden light of Caprica, but still very pretty. They all zoom down like asteroids and fall into formation. Helo sees no Cylons on dradis, but does note that a Raptor has vanished. He checks up, and 612 is gone, "Tough Guy" and "Carousel" ("Tapestry." "Coffee Mug." "Pride & Prejudice."), and then figures out finally that they've jumped into a mountain. Not upside it, you understand, but actually BAMF-ed right into the center of rock. Gross. Starbuck swallows, no weakness or hesitation. "Damn." Over the comms, she notifies them that 612 is gone, and that they're going ahead. "Scumball" apparently rogers that and they go zooming toward the Resistance area.

"Before Narnia and Middle Earth," there was something that sounded very fucking suspicious until I checked out the SciFi website and figured out it was The Ring Of The Nibelung, soothing the geek inside that just wants to disagree with every fucking thing until it gets proof. The ugliest part of anyone.

Debate Part II. Gaius is just finishing up a nonexistent plank ("I would think that my position and the position of my campaign is abundantly clear," he says, which is hilarious from a script point of view, if you think about it.) and Jim gives Laura thirty seconds. "Well, my initial response," she begins -- and it's important to note that, from what we've seen, she's the first of them to go there like this, with the ad hominemphilosophy swipe -- "is, there he goes again. Once again, ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Baltar is distorting the real issues before us. The issue here -- the real question -- is not allowing the scriptures to dictate the policy of this government." Oh, is it? Because that kind of makes you an asshole, doesn't it? Gaius smirks and crosses his arms, facing Roslin and the crowd equally, brilliantly telegenic and effortless with his semiotics: "We're a bit skeptical of this stance, aren't we?" Laura continues down this stupid-ass path. "The question is, do the scriptures contain real-world relevance? Do they contain the information necessary to guide us to a safer home than some completely unknown planet that we've just now discovered?" Baltar turns another fifteen degrees toward the audience, his face mocking and beautiful: "Oh, come on now." But seriously, what the fuck is Roslin even talking about? "Obviously, my answer to that question is yes. I have always and will continue to feel the scriptures hold real-world relevance." Which is a great way to not say what you mean. What Roslin means is, if the Bible says the Ark is fifteen steps north and six west, you don't have to believe in God to follow the directions. But what she's saying is, "I love transubstantiation so much I pretend it's happening even with my corn flakes." Which nobody would actually think or say.

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Battlestar Galactica




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