Battlestar Galactica

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B | 3 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
The Garden Of The Scar

Meanwhile, Kara gets in her magic shiny Viper for the first time in months.

So Laura and Gaius notice the screaming hostages getting herded past but apparently they have special privileges and aren't really hostages or prisoners so much as valued guests who can't leave and even Leoben and his adorable new haircut are getting worried due to Three's whole unreconstructed retro-warfare Cylon vibe and Laura decides enough is enough and asks to go visit with Three, but Gaius points out that Three thinks Laura is just adorable, "sweetie," but isn't about to parlay with her about this, and asks to go instead because he was there in the Temple of Five when she saw the Final Five and went blind and died and all that, and really if you think about it he's to blame for everything that happened with her, maybe still is, and part of that has always been that she associates him with God for some reason and I mean, look at him now, so Laura agrees that this is a smart plan and that Gaius is a man and a human being who can actually do something useful, and sends him off to C&C and then just sits there vibrating with worries, and over on Galactica Three and Lee are still pissing and he lets her know that Galen and Sam are in the airlock now too, which freaks everybody out, even Supertoaster Tory Foster gets a little cramp in her strudel that time, and needless to say Leoben and Six are shitting it, and Lee presses his advantage.

Kara turns it on, her bird; it starts to spin up all its systems. Like something coming alive.

Tory points out that nobody, especially President Leland, would actually airlock the Fleet's chance at Earth -- any more than Three would let him airlock her Final Three of Five, so like, is this still stupid or what? -- and tells Three to keep going and push him, because she doesn't know that Adama drooled on him a second ago and now he's a grown-ass man, and Three points the Basestar's nukes at the civilian Fleet -- tacky -- and Gaius enters with Leoben, and sunlight breaks out all over her face, because she likes Gaius and when you like Gaius, sure, you can take some time out from exterminating the entire human race for the third time in as many years and you know, just shoot the shit. Because the alternative is that we're being told that Three, despite being a genius and a bad-ass in every way, is so ga-ga for Gaius that it wouldn't really matter what he told her, because she'd just do it, because girls are dumb and dicks are magic. And I really don't think that's how this works.

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Battlestar Galactica

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