Big Brother
A Minor Miscalculation

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Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
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Stupid Is As Stupid Does

Previously on Big Brother 3: Marcellas kicked Amy when she was down. Roddy kicked Amy when she was down. Amy was down quite a lot, actually. Sometimes face-first. Roddy danced like a circus bear, but could do nothing to prevent his ouster by his resolute housemates once his Voodoo Vibes of Love failed to persuade Amy to use the veto to rescue him. It was okay, though, because his mother still loved him. For some reason. Something nefarious was going on in the general vicinity of Jason's hair, but whatever it was did not prevent him from grabbing HoH in one of the shortest competitions ever.

Blue-and-white Roddy is evicted some more. Over the usual gloomy dirge, Jason says in the DR that Roddy was "an amazing leader." Danielle says "Nothing personal, just business" again. You know, I'm starting to think Danielle's diary room sessions are entirely made up of a set of phrases she has on index cards. The countdown, "Nothing personal, just business," "He's the devil," "That girl gone crazy!" and so forth. She should just start calling out the numbers of the cards. Like, she could tell us that number three is "nothing personal, just business," and then in the DR, she could just yell out, "Number three!" We would all try to remember to think it was funny. Or at least as funny as we think it is now. "Ho-ho-ho, number three!," we would chortle uncomfortably. Anyway, Jason tells us that Lisa really wanted to give Roddy a "sympathy vote," but Danielle and Marcellas were against it, so it didn't happen. Because Danielle and Marcellas are the boss of everyone, I suppose. Oy. Amy DRs that Roddy was "a magnificent person." Of course, if you saw her "Oh, Roddy, you melted my icy heart with your acetylene torch of kindness and generosity" speech last week, you've certainly seen worse. In fact, you've probably seen your own stomach contents, so we have nowhere to go but up.

Marcellas: "Roddy. Deserved. To go. He wasn't playing well, and he wasn't playing honorably." In case you haven't noticed, Marcellas's nobility theme has been snowballing out of control, and this is the week it is beginning to roll over entire European chalets and swallow the locals, so that all you can see sticking out of the snowball is their skis. And the occasional red snow boot. It's all about personal goodness from here on in -- Marcellas good, Roddy bad. In fact, Marcellas good, everyone else bad. It's a morality play, dammit, and Marcellas is all the actors, the director, and the audience. Everyone else is just props. Props, I tell you!

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Big Brother

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