Big Brother
A Minor Miscalculation

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Stupid Is As Stupid Does

Marcellas says in the DR that they all felt terrible about letting Jason down. Sad music plays. Because they forced Jason to be strapped to a table and pounded with hammers. Oh, no. He has to eat peanut butter and jelly. I forgot.

Dramatic music accompanies the start of nomination day, as the houseguests comment in the DR that the day feels a little dark. Marcellas also comments, "All of us are at our wits' end with Amy, and have slated Amy to go." Oh, look! Foreshadowing (tm Sars) is making shadow puppets on the wall of the DR! Then Danielle, Lisa, and Jason discuss whether Marcellas or Amy should be evicted this week. Hmm, so much for Marcellas's theory of untouchability. Anyway, Danielle says that she's ready to be rid of Marcellas, because she hasn't forgotten that he spilled his guts to Roddy about her plans. She continues telling Marcellas, however, that she's got his back. (DRINK!)

Nomination preparations, yakkety yak. Jason feels like an "executioner," he looks somberly at the memory wall, and he contemplates all the women he has passed up the opportunity to sleep with, just in the last few months. Okay, I am guessing about the last part. He laments the grave, grave responsibilities of being HoH. He loves everyone, hates to have to nominate anyone, blah dee blah. This part is always so incredibly boring. Seriously, they should just cut to the ceremony already, because no one every says anything of interest during the stupid pre-nom voice-overs with the porno music in the background. Seriously, listen to that music. Can't you just hear the people moaning?

At the ceremony, the (un)lucky nominees are Amy and Marcellas. That makes -- what -- five nominations for Amy? Jason tells them that he has no particular reason for nominating them, because he adores them both, and thinks they're wonderful. He particularly butters up the self-proclaimed fabulous ass of Marcellas. At the end of the speech, he also points out that Lisa and Danielle are hardly swimming in security, given the availability of that Golden Veto.

When the ceremony is over, Amy talks good-naturedly with Danielle and Lisa about her apparently permanent nominee status. Elsewhere, Jason sits down with Marcellas and tries to be friendly, and at first, Marcellas tries to reciprocate. Before long, though, Marcellas can't help launching into a little set of unhappy remarks about the fact that although he understands, he does feel like he's done more for Jason than Danielle has. I always forget that these people don't all know about the Jason-Danielle Alliance of Extra-Secret Secrecy, so of course Marcellas doesn't realize that there was never any chance that Jason would put up Danielle. Pounding Jaws-esque music plays as Jason tries to dance around Marcellas's feelings of betrayal. In the bathroom, Marcellas bitches to Danielle about his nomination: "I've played this game about loyalty, kindness, and conscience." Hmm. I think Gerry might have a little something to say about the "loyalty" and "kindness" part. In fact, considering the hot-tub alliance, Roddy might have a little something to say about at least the "loyalty" part. And Tonya might have a few words about "kindness." Amy, of course, could blow the whole ridiculous theory out of the water with one drunken unloading of the pain he's caused her, but she probably won't. At any rate, Marcellas claims to have "thrown himself in the path of a train" for Jason. Excuse me, when was that? Oh yeah -- NEVER. Marcellas tells her that it's time for them to cut Jason loose -- it should be he and Danielle for sure. Danielle manages not to cringe visibly, which is more than I can say for myself. What Marcellas is doing here, of course, has the opposite effect from what he intends. What it does is seal his own fate, because Danielle can tell that Marcellas has decided that Jason is now a Bad Person, and Marcellas has been, if nothing else, merciless with anyone he deems to be not as good as he is. Well, let me rephrase. He doesn't think anyone is as good as he is, but when he decides you've violated his standards of behavior in some way, he will stop at nothing to dole out punishment. So Danielle knows that if she leaves Marcellas in for even one more week, she and Jason are going to be in big trouble.

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Big Brother

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