Big Brother
Amber Waves Goodbye

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Amber Waves Goodbye

Chenderdome. Amber says she got voted out because everyone was threatened by her. She blames Eric the most for her eviction because he was playing both sides. Julie awesomely asks how you determine who in the game is good and bad, and Amber mushmouths an answer that encompasses everything from making deals to being rude -- basically, a bad person is anyone who isn't Amber or Jameka. Or maybe the ghost of Nick. Speaking of whom, when Julie asks whether Amber thinks God didn't want her to win Big Brother, Amber actually takes some responsibility, saying that she made a lot of mistakes in the game, like voting Nick out. She further thinks that, in being on TV, she was "shown to the world," so that whether it's her future career as a motivational speaker, or possibly enrollment in nursing school (which would be affected by her short-lived and somewhat shameful TV career...how?), something will come out of this for Amber. Man, I have seen some deluded reality-show contestants before, but Amber seriously makes Jade seem lucid.

Anyway: goodbye messages. Daniele thinks Amber is really nice. Gosh, I'm overwhelmed by all the intense emotion. Zach backs up Amber's story about how her eviction was ordained because she has another destiny yet to come and whatever the fuck, but manages to get through it without cracking up, so well done, sir. Eric spins some bullshit, which Amber doesn't seem to buy. Jessica spins some more bullshit, which ditto. Dick is sorry to see Amber go, but it's just a game. And finally, Jameka, which is when Amber completely loses it, of course. Jameka loves Amber and is going to do everything she can to win for both of them. God, Amber, thank God our time together is over.

HoH competition. Jameka is now on Week 4 of HoH ineligibility. The task is one of those Sisyphean labours: you have to take tea down a greased-up runway to a big fishbowl; if you fill it enough, it'll cause a silver ball to bob up in your fishbowl; once the ball is bobbing high enough for you to be able to get it out of the cover on your fishbowl, you grab it out, and then you win. But in addition to the hazard of the greased-up runway, you have to carry the tea down, one three-ounce teacup at a time. Which, since the fishbowl holds sixteen gallons, it'll be over six hundred trips back and forth to fill them. Which means I'm done! I probably could look up who won by now, but it's 4:14 AM, and, like Amber, I'm about ready to cry myself to sleep.

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Big Brother

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