Big Brother
Big Brother

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C- | 472 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
America's Jerkweed

Daniele tells Dick she doesn't think Zach will put Dick up. She claims that she has pull with Zach based on this friendship they've developed (yuck), and she thinks he'll put up Jessica and Jameka. Dick is not reassured. Elsewhere, Eric continues to profusely apologize to Jessica for pretty much being wrong about everything and steering her away from everything that it would have been a good idea for her to do. He says they'll have to hope Jameka gets the boot. Eric swears that he will offer Zach "the sun, the moon, and the stars" to keep Jessica in the house. Eric has no access to any of those things.

Zach, of course, asks who wants to see his HoH room, and everybody tries to ignore him, because once again: graceless assholes. He eventually drags everybody up there, where he gets the food and the pictures. Eric gripes to the camera about how much he didn't care about seeing Zach's pictures, and then bored music plays as everyone conspicuously makes it clear that Zach is the new Jen ("We hate him together, which makes us awesome!"), and they gradually wander off like the extraordinarily poor sports they are. Well, they all wander off except Daniele.

Daniele stays behind to get after Zach. She tells him that her dad feels nervous, and Zach reminds her that Dick did threaten him and swear at him and scream at him and call him names. Daniele tells Zach that she hates her dad as well. Zach asks if she'll tell Dick everything she says, and she lies she won't, and Zach believes her, because she's so good at acting like she means it when she says she doesn't love the way her dad acts like a violent, bigoted bully on her behalf. Zach talks about how "embarrassing" he thinks Dick's behavior is, and he comes off quite like a level-headed adult. Daniele tells him that he'd better be really careful, and pretty much warns him that if he crosses her dad, her dad will come after him. In other words, "Yes, I agree with you that criminals are sooooo corrupt and bad, and I hate them, too -- especially that one guy who collects money for me. He's such a total jerk that if you don't give him five grand, he's totally going to have you killed. I just haaaaate him." Asked if he's planning to put Dick up, Zach says he doesn't know. He DRs that he really doesn't want to keep Dick. "Can you really trust a guy named Dick?" he asks. Hey, we were all thinking it.

Big Brother

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