Big Brother
America's Jerkweed

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Miss Alli: D+ | Grade It Now!
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America's Jerkweed

There is an announcement from Big Brother that, instead of putting your tea into the big tank, you can use a few trips to fill a small beaker, and the first to do so gets a phone call from home, which you can keep or give away. Because he's a total disaster with regard to the competition anyway, Eric decides to give up and go for the phone call. (MS: "I hate Eric's family in advance.") Daniele, on the other hand, decides to stay with the contest. She wants the win! The win! I half-expect at any time a change in the rules stating that any blood relatives in the competition can combine their tanks into one and be co-HoHs. If, you know, there happen to be any blood relatives.

The contest progresses, and now Zach seems to have pulled ahead. There is a new announcement, which says that each person now has the option to use one or two additional cups to make the whole thing go faster, but for each cup used (total), the house goes on cold water for a day. So when everyone takes both cups, the result is that the house will be on cold water only for a total of eight days. That won't be fun. Yay! I'm not sure why Eric took the two cups, considering that he's so far out of it.

Dick insists that having been a waiter was a big help to him in carrying these cups around. I'm just happy to see how drowned-ratty he looks now that he's all wet. Without his produce-enhanced do, he just looks like a sad dude you'd see unsuccessfully trying to pick up chicks at Forever 21 and getting chased out by security. Zach tells us that he ultimately returned to using two cups instead of all three, which means he could move a lot faster.

Dick reminds us that before the live show, he had attacked Zach, so he knows that he's in big trouble if Zach becomes HoH. We learn that Zach accused Dick of having an "obtuse way of thinking" during this discussion, which is great, because Dick doesn't really know what that means. What's also great is that Zach is really not thrown by the discussion with Dick; he's just disgusted. Dick tries and tries to upset Zach, and Zach just sips his drink and acts like Dick is crazy and doesn't even raise his voice. Dick keeps screaming and yelling and calling Zach names, and Zach kind of knows not to take it to heart too much. Zach is now my favorite player by far. Kind of dumb, and making his big move way too late, but still.

Dick tells us that the contest came down to him and Zach. Dad versus dude. Zach says he was purely focused on winning. "It's up to me," Dick says seriously of his responsibility to his alliance. "Zach can't win this HoH."

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Big Brother

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