Big Brother
America's Jerkweed

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Miss Alli: D+ | Grade It Now!
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America's Jerkweed

And now: America's Player! Whom should Eric cruelly mimic to show them how annoying they are? Can I vote that Eric mock himself? Come to think of it, can I vote that Eric punch himself in the face?

When we get back, it's almost time for nominations. Daniele tells us that Zach is a back-scratching kind of guy, so having chosen twice not to put him up, she's not worried at all. Eric tells us that Zach is a big loser who will have his one moment to take out one person. That's one more than Eric's had, you'll notice. Jessica says that she nominated Zach last week, so she's pretty damn sure she's on the hook this week. Zach is conflicted, but I'm not sure why, really. Jameka says she doesn't think she's the target, but anything can happen, and so forth. Zach says he wants to take out threats to himself, and he has to work all the angles. He's an angle-working man!

Zach brings out the great big box of keys. He announces that it's a very hard choice, and that he didn't decide until the last minute, basing it on his relationships. "That being said," he will declare the first person safe. And it's Dick. Way to go, idiot. Dick pulls Daniele's name. Daniele pulls Eric's name. This entire thing is just so damn stupid at this point. You might as well hand Dick and Daniele the money. Zach says he's nominated Jameka because their "social situations haven't evolved." He says that she has good relationships with other people, though. As for Jessica, Zach says he gets why she put him up, but everyone likes her, so he fears her at the end. Jessica says that Zach just took the "cop-out" because he didn't want to nominate Dick or Daniele. Jameka says she can't wait for POV. Zach says he has no regrets. "Hopefully, I'll conquer," he says. The incredibly smug Daniele brags about how her relationship with Zach paid off. Eric says he blames himself for Jessica being nominated, and he thinks she blames him, too. He couldn't be more devastated. I vote for Eric to be stung by a bee.

Next: A lot of other things, but mostly, goddamn Janelle comes back, which I fortunately do not have to recap.

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Big Brother

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