"As far as I can tell, [Hardly's] turning to the dark side," Will tells the camera. "He's dyed his hair black, he's got these bags under his eyes, and now he's smoking cigarettes." It's true; generally cigarette-smoking men are bad, bad news. At least on television. And not only is Hardly smoking, he's gotten himself addicted to the cigs. Unfortunately for him, he's run out of them. Hardly tries to broker a trade with Bunky, PowerBars for cigarettes, but Bunky's driving what Hardly feels is an unreasonably hard bargain: one PowerBar per cigarette. He really holds firm to this, and good for him. Bunky figured out, weeks ago, that the cigarettes would be good bartering material, and they are. While Bunky is amused by Hardly's increasing desperation to get some nicotine, Hardly is not. He basically threatens to nominate Bunky if Bunky doesn't give him a better deal. Bunky just smiles, and sticks to his guns. He knows he's toast this week anyway. Where was this spine last week? "That wasn't a smart maneuver," Hardly grouses, as Bunky refuses, for the twelfth time, to bargain. In the Diary Room, Will wonders where Bunky found his backbone: "He's like the new big gay guy on campus." It'sOnica is proud of Bunky for sticking to his guns. "You can't let people chop you down," she tells him. Bunky tells her that he's not going to kiss Hardly's butt anymore. "I don't need to take all this crap that I've been taking from people, and I'm going to start telling people what I think," he announces. Hey, I think that was a little story arc we just saw there! From Crying Baby to Black Market Cigarette Dealer: The Bunky McBunky'sLastName Story.
Hardly and Nicole enter yet another of their seemingly endless and definitely boring strategy sessions. Nicole admits that she feels bad about voting Bunky out of the house. She'd really like Hardly to nominate Bunky and It'sOnica, so that they can get rid of It'sOnica, but she'll do whatever Hardly wants her to do. Hardly snits that the most viable threat to their success is Bunky. In the Diary Room, Nicole wonders whether there's any way Hardly could turn against her, and stab her in the back.
The next segment is devoted to how funny Will is, which is hardly news to me. Nicole's theory is that Will's humorous antics are designed solely to keep him in the house. Personally, I think Will is just naturally funny. He might be turning it up to increase his chances of being kept around, but his being funny isn't a put-on. In the Big Blue Chair of Bringing the Funny, Will admits that he's proud of being funny, and that he hopes, maybe, that'll help him out when it comes time for people to vote. Later, at dinner, Hardly says, "I like my meat like I like my women." People chew. "What? Rare?" Will quips. Oh, burn! What follows is a montage of Funny Will: Will talking to vegetables in funny voices; Will re-enacting Titanic in the pool; Will flinging himself under the outside shower and screaming. People laugh. Even sour, crabby Nicole laughs. Then she's inwardly furious at Will for breaching her cranky and inhuman exterior.