Big Brother
Big Brother After Dark

Episode Report Card
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When You're Asleep, You're Lucky

12:17 AM: Dustin does some more yoga, because it helps him think. Yes, that's it. And then we go back to Zach, but the instant he mentions the name of BB producer Alison Grodner in connection with trying to hustle to get people interested in the TV shows he's developing, we go right back to Dustin and Jessica. This is the only part I think is actually interesting so far, is watching as the panicky feed controllers decide what they can and ought to show us. Zach! No, Jessica! No, Zach! Wait, he said "Alison Grodner"! Cut! Cut!

12:19 AM: The control voice calls Jessica to the diary room. If I didn't have four million reasons I'd never come close to doing this show, the tendency of that voice to say rude things loudly at random intervals would do it.

12:20 AM: Why does Eric have nipple rings? I hate nipple rings. There is no good reason for that. America doesn't lead him around by those.

12:22 AM: Amber assures Zach that they will get a lot of offers when this is over. Zach calls his existing job "a gift from heaven," but that undoubtedly doesn't mean he won't do a celebrity poker tournament here and there.

Me: I like it when there are these long pauses where it's just people thinking. It's so quiet, you can hear the rubber band engine whirring in there.
MS: You can hear the air whooshing around the thought bubbles over their heads.

12:23 AM: The evening's most compelling story, "Jameka Eats," continues. Literally, this is a Showtime channel, which people pay to receive on their televisions, and right now, what is on is a lady who is chewing. But wait! Also, Dustin is folding laundry. He and Jameka discussing their fears that Dustin might be booted tomorrow night instead of Dick. [Note: ....]Dustin is particularly concerned because Dick doesn't seem upset, and it seems like Dick should be upset if Dick is leaving. Eat, Jameka, eat!

12:26 AM: Dustin has switched to rolling his laundry.

12:27 AM: Zach explains how he and somebody back at home always look at each other on a webcam. It's probably family, but it might be his team of shrinks.

12:28 AM: MS: "It's too bad this is probably all going to backfire on everyone, since Dustin is the only one I don't actively want to see devoured by groundhogs."

12:29 AM: I didn't even know David Duchovny lived in the Big Brother house!

12:32 AM: Jameka spends long minutes trying to figure out how many votes there will be next week. She never really reaches a conclusion. Jessica does say that someone from "their side," meaning Dick and Daniele's side, will go home, and I desperately hope she means it, because the crawl tells us that Dick has approached Eric about a deal.

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Big Brother




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