Big Brother
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

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Love Is a Poorly Rendered Thing

Chiara and Lisa are relaxing in the hammock, not feeling too confident about the nomination process. Kiki takes a shot at reassurance with a comment that reaffirms that she has absolutely no clue what's going on: "If Gerry puts us up, he's fuckin' fried." Okay. First of all, nitwit, if Gerry puts you up, nobody in your hideous little cabal is going to be any more firmly set against him than you are right now, and he knows it, because with the exception of Roddy, you've all been treating him like rotten meat twenty-four hours a day for three weeks, which you have done exactly because you're not smart enough to think this far ahead. ("This far" being "one step.") Second of all, if he puts two of the four of you up and is willing to replace one of you with another one of you in case of veto, one of you is going out, period. And then there will be three of you, and five people who are not you. Quite honestly, Skunky Brewster, the minute Gerry won HoH, your hideous little cabal ceased being some kind of Überclique of Inevitability, and you're just going to have to deal. You are not an avenging superhero, so take off the sequined bustier and disembark from the invisible jet already. Ahem.

Jason and Gerry talk in the kitchen. Gerry says he'd like to hear Jason's thoughts if Jason wants to share any, and Jason aw-shuckses that he'd love to just sit down and shoot the gol-durned breeze if Gerry really thinks that little old him might have anything useful to say. Now that I know what a smoothie Jason really is, I must say that watching him play the clueless cutie-pie is very entertaining. His shirt, on the other hand, has such an aggressive little microcheck pattern that it makes the TV vibrate. Do me a favor -- if you ever go on a reality show, do not wear teeny prints. As if their sheer upholstery-like qualities weren't enough, they create technical difficulties. "I know you're going to do a great job," Jason says cheerily. Hee.

Chiara whines in a way she obviously thinks is endearing (not) that the one person she didn't want to win was the person who won. Boo hoo. She calls Gerry "a loose cannon" in terms of the nomination process. A loose cannon? There are only eight people to choose from, and he has to nominate two of them. It's not like he's going to throw a wrench into the game by nominating Bill Moyers and Iron Chef French. Chiara and Danielle yap in the storage room, and Danielle promises that she will support Kiki with her vote and, if necessary, a veto. They hug, both checking each other's backs for convenient spots into which a knife could be plunged. Danielle diary-rooms that Chiara trusts her and is a good ally for her, so she can stay, for now. Kiki, snowed like Mount Rainier, goes and tells Roddy about this conversation with Danielle, apparently now very secure that she isn't at risk. Roddy seems a trifle suspicious, and he diary-rooms that Gerry has to know that if he found himself in the final three with Roddy and Chiara, they would certainly "gang up on him," so Roddy still suspects that he and the Duchess of Dim are possible targets. Roddy, of course, has a deal with Gerry from last week, presumably making him safe for the moment. Indeed, Gerry brings the Rod into the HoH room and tells him that the deal is on and he is safe. And then, in my favorite part, he says, "Do you want Chiara safe, too?" Roddy tells Gerry that he really likes Chiara, he's attracted to her, but...frankly, he's not out to protect her in the context of the game. Furthermore, she's made it clear that for strategy purposes, her allegiance is to the women. I have to say that whether he gives a crap about her or not, this is probably the only thing you can do in this situation. The only chance you have is to draw the line and draw it dark. Game here, looove over there. Bang, zoom, end of story. Similarly, out by the hot tub, Eric explains to Josh that he doesn't have any particular allegiance to Lisa in terms of the game, so if Lisa goes, she goes. Again, I don't tend to see this as scummy in the slightest; draw the line between the love and the game, or you'll actually wind up screwing up both.

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Big Brother

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