Bunky admits to us that there's one little problem with his alliance with It'sOnica: the third person he wants to see in the final three is Nicole. He realizes that it's going to be a tough row to hoe, convincing It'sOnica to keep Nicole around and boot Hardly instead. "That's going to be very tricky for me, to balance that relationship," Bunky says. Also, to communicate with his co-conspirator.
Okay, so everyone's whining about how bored they are. They want to see a movie. They want a beer. They want to watch television. Whine, whine, whine. This is all leading up to the next luxury challenge. This whole episode consists of challenges. I hate recapping the challenges. I want to die. Anyway, first off, everyone has to put on this orange jumpsuit, like they're in a chain gang, cleaning garbage off the freeway. Will is thrilled with the jumpsuits because, he says, he's "always dreamed of being a fireman-slash-stripper." Okay, maybe you could say that the outfits are fireman/stripper outfits. Fine. CalTrans worker/ fireman/ stripper outfits. Whatever. In the living room, Will and Hardly approach the similarly be-jumpsuited Nicole and It'sOnica. "I was wondering if anyone in this house has a glass of water?" Will asks. "Because we've been working outside, and we're a little sweaty." Then he and Hardly start dancing and peeling off their jumpsuits, like strippers! Nicole and It'sOnica burst into peals of delighted laughter. As, frankly, do I. ["As did I, my sister Toque, and Glark. Because no one can resist the Power of Will." -- Wing Chun] Ah, male strippers are intrinsically funny. A couple of years ago, one of my friends got married, and we all went to this Chippendale's-esque strip show for her bachelorette party, and it was hysterical! The show culminated in an act in which the stripper dude lit his crotch on fire. Ah, good times!
The rest of the luxury competition is basically just this long-ass commercial for Blockbuster Video and American Pie 2, and because if you want to advertise on Mighty Big TV, you need to contact our ad broker, all I'm going to say is that it involves a block of ice, a movie ticket, and a hatchet without the blade. Bunky wins. What does he win? A screening of the aforesaid movie. In the Bat Cave, not a real movie theatre. To which, after minor waffling, he takes It'sOnica. They seem to enjoy the film. I'm sure, after forty-some days in the house without any kind of external stimulation whatsoever, they'd have a blast watching professional bowling.