Big Brother
Down With Dick

Episode Report Card
Joe R: B- | Grade It Now!
Down With Dick

Food competition. There's a "rock n roll" theme, because Dick's the big fucking star of the show, I guess. There's some fuss about Zach insisting on being on the blue-bandana team, which sticks poor Dustin on a team with Dick, Jen, and Daniele. Everyone dresses up in leather pants and feather boas and stupid hair. Dick doesn't so much need to dress up. The point of the game is to smash guitars to find cards that either read "$" or "slop." Twenty "$" cards and you win. Of note: Dick uncovers a Slop Pass for himself, Amber's guitar selections are guided by Jehovah, and Jen's wig looked like it was made out of mirrorballs. Daniele DRs that her team broke way more guitars but were unlucky in that most of them had "slop" cards, while Eric says his team went for guitars that were farther away, but those paid off better. Eric, Amber, Jameka, and Zach win. Dick first tries to give his Slop Pass away to Daniele, but she convinces him to give it to Jen, for what she assures us in the DR were "game reasons." God forbid we jump to the erroneous conclusion that she likes Jen. Eric DRs that it was a pretty obvious gesture by Dick to shore up Jen's allegiance, which is true, but also: how the hell did the LNC fail to bring Jen over to their side? The fact that she's aligned with Dick right now is a total failure on Eric's team's part.

The weekly "Zach Is Weird" segment brings us the following breaking news: Zach likes being in his bunny suit. He finds it freeing. I'm thinking Zach's going to undergo a change of lifestyle outside the house. Jessica DRs that she also prefers Bunny Zach to Real Zach. In the bathroom, Dustin and Amber fake-ogle him, though I think Dustin's more serious about it than Amber is. That suit does show off Zach's butt nicely. It does nothing for the Billy Bob face, though.

America's Player. Eric's instructions are to get Dustin nominated. Damn, America. I don't know whether to respect your creative wrench-throwing or be disgusted that you prefer Dick to Dustin. Eric, for his part, has chosen to be disgusted. He bitches that it would be much easier if America were to choose for him based on the strategic alliances he's developed in the house. Listen here, short stack. The promos say that you're working for us, okay? Not the other way around. Anyway, it's fortunate for Eric that Dustin is feeling a liiitttle too secure about his place in the house (and a little too righteous in opposition to Dick, which I wouldn't have thought possible), and he brags that if Jessica were to nominate him versus Dick, he'd win in a landslide. There's a little "ding!" on the soundtrack to indicate that Eric now has his opening to earn his America's Player dollars. Eric approaches Jessica with this idea. He then goes further, talking about how Dustin is rumored to have secret alliances with everyone in the house and is possibly not to be trusted. See, this is where Eric gets himself into trouble. This is a week where he needs to give lip service to trying to get Dustin out but accept that he won't be successful. Going the extra mile and talking shit about Dustin is only going to come back and bite him later.

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Big Brother




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