So now we see the four of them waiting outside the house, each of them already assigned to a clique. Brian's in a "Brains" shirt (which is hilarious), Jessica is in "Popular," Jessie in "Athletic," and Cowboy is in "Off-Beat." So how to decide which of them goes in? Whichever of their cliques wins the HoH competition that's about to begin, that person goes in as the new HoH. Can't argue with the simplicity of that. But I do take extreme issue that it seems like Jessie has a better chance than anyone of reentering the house. Urgh.
Back to the viewscreen. Julie tells the HGs about the 13th potential houseguests, and how winning the competition will represent a huge advantage: they get an extra person, plus that person is in their clique, which means they're safe. She doesn't mention that no matter what happens, the clique that wins this will outnumber one other clique by two to one at this time next week. There's advantages, and there's sitting on the scale.
So now the lighting grids rise up, and the giant briefs lift them all clear off the basketball court. They still have to hang onto their toilet seats, which seem to be hanging from the same cable as the briefs, so if one goes down, the other goes up. There is lots of complaining, and the first one to let go is Michele. Her elastic briefs catch her before she hits the ground, which is adding injury to insult. Ronnie's down next, which leaves Chima up there alone for the brains. She hates her team already.
And now Julie announces that the four waiting houseguests will each get to vote to give a "super-wedgie" to the team of their choice. It's one for Off-Beat (courtesy of Jessie), two for Athletes, and one for Popular (thanks to Brian). Lydia can't withstand the super-wedgie, which basically amounts to shaking to go along with the dangling, and she lets go. Jordan from Popular drops next, and then when Kevin falls, Casey is the only "Off-Beater" (his word) left. Then Jeff drops from the Athletes grid, and that's at least one person out from each clique. Julie calls for another round of super-wedgies. All give the Athletes super-wedgies, except for Jessie, who votes for Brains. And that shakes Chima off, and the Brains are done. "First one out twice," someone cracks to Brian as he leaves in defeat. Hee! Next goes Casey, and with the Off-Beats out of the competition, that's it for Cowboy. Now it's two each from Popular and the Athletes. And time for more ads. And time for me to think about how annoying it's going to be for me to spend a whole season recapping two cliques whose name are nouns and two whose names are adjectives. That's going to be both annoying and irritation.
More hanging. Natalie shows off a little bit. Laura is the next to drop, leaving Braden alone up there for the Popular group. Laura claims in the DR to have thrown it so as not to put a target on her back. Why not? It would help balance out the two targets on her front. Braden and Natalie shit-talk each other a bit, but finally Braden drops, losing it for the Popular clique. That means Jessica's out, and Jessie's going back in. As HoH, no less. I want to kill myself.
After the HoH, there's lots of fretting in the house about the oncoming clique war, and Julie starts teasing the HGs about their new housemate. They guess Jessie (although Natalie's hoping for the return of Matty, which tells us everything we need to know about Natalie), and as they head back into the house through the back, so does Jessie, through the front. The door closes behind him, and screams are heard from behind it. They don't come close to drowning out my own. Man, I couldn't stand that guy the first time around, and now I have to deal with him for a minimum of two more weeks. How do I get myself into these things?