Big Brother

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Hopeless Casey

Casey's still in the banana suit for his exit Chenterview, as Julie observes that Jessie was turning red throughout Casey's tirade. Casey says that's fine, since he's not a fan of Jessie's. Julie asks him about choosing the margarita party in the PoV competition, and asks how Casey missed the signs that he was in danger. Casey admits that he made the mistake of trusting Jessie. Finally Julie gets tired of listening to him babble and cues up the farewell messages.

Russell: He tried, but couldn't come up with the votes. Ronnie's farewell is smug and obnoxious, of course. Jordan is sweet, and Natalie reveals that she is not the "immature 18-year-old" that Casey thinks she is, but a 24-year-old with a college degree, and that's why he's gone. I'm still not convinced she isn't immature. Kevin wishes Casey the best. Michele laments having Ronnie as the only other married person in the house, with a thumbs-down and a raspberry. Jeff tells him, "Walk out of here with your banana high, bro." And that, my friends, is what she said.

Then Julie invites Casey to stay and watch while she breaks up the cliques. She gets back on the viewscreen, and they all know what's coming in advance. They're not surprised when Julie tells them the cliques are over, but when she tells them that one of them "will be granted a mystery power," they're all like, "oooohh." Julie talks it up, and adds that only the person with the power will know what it is, and as far as who will get it? That's up to America. Or, more accurately, the segment of America that gives enough of a shit to vote about this silliness. Julie does tell them that HoH and PoV are more important than ever, "because that is the only way to guarantee your safety." You know, unlike all the other weeks.

Julie dismisses them to the backyard for the HoH competition and tells us about the mystery power, which is called the "Coup D'etat." This will allow the person who has the power to flip either one of the next two eviction ceremonies on its head by replacing one or both of the nominees. In case you don't get what that means, Julie explains that there could be two new nominees on the block seconds before the live vote, which would of course knock any pre-vote strategizing into a cocked hat. "Now that could be a game-changer," Julie says. Yes, we know. The announcer tells us how to text our votes. Or, I should say, text their votes, because I don't know about you, but I ain't voting for shit.

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Big Brother

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