God, voting, at last.
Bunky goes first. He sobs like he's sending Krusta to the gas chamber. It's really skirting the edge of embarrassing. Poor baby. I think Bunky's emotion is genuine, but I doubt he's like this all the time. I suspect the stress of being in the house has turned him into a ball of unrestrained, raw emotion. Anyway, Julie races through the chit-chat -- in which Bunky says he's Hardly and Nicole's "puppet" -- and swiftly dismisses Krusta, with a "get a hold of yourself, man" expression. Seriously, I think Bunky is a doll. He's obviously very sensitive. But he knew this moment was coming. Frankly, if it were me, and I knew I was going to be all emotional, I'd just stalk into the Diary Room, sit down, cast my vote, tell Julie I couldn't talk, and race out before I broke down on live television. What would they do, fire me?
Hardly's turn. Hardly also votes to evict Krusta. He's not really happy about his vote, either, he says, but he has to.....yawn. I'm sorry, I changed channels. Hardly's boring now. Something about how he's playing for himself? Because I didn't catch that the first eight billion times he mentioned it.
Will Time! He plops down in the Big Blue Chair and asks Julie for advice. She twitters flirtatiously. Thank God he's not crying; I couldn't take any more of that. But he does seem a little sad. Will votes to evict Krusta, because, he says, he can't go against Nicole. "I'm too weak," he admits.
At last, Julie reads the vote. Krusta hugs a sobbing Bunky, promising to call Greg for him, and shakes Hardly's and Nicole's hands. "Good game, Nicole. See you at the end," she says. I can't see Nicole's expression, but I doubt she's quaking in her boots. Krusta takes Will and It'sOnica to the door, where Will admits that he was weak, and really does seem sorry to have voted her out. Mid-admission, It'sOnica breaks down and starts babbling. Krusta cuts her off, and continues to tell Will how weak it was for him to sell her out to "them" when he promised Mike to look after her. Will looks sad. Krusta hugs him. She forgives his weak-willed ass.
Finally, Krusta calmly turns to the sobbing It'sOnica. "Goddamn them!" It'sOnica says, and then unleashes a long speech, much of which is bleeped out by the censors, the rest of which makes no sense. It's like "bleep bleep bleep, they wanna dog me out, bleep bleep bleep chili, bleep ribonucleic acid." Krusta is like, dude, chill. "Bleep, bleep, time is a universal invariant, bleep, bleep!" Krusta's all, seriously, shut up. "Bleep, Krusta! Bleep it's on! Bleep the infield fly rule bleep! Bleep cheese bleep flip flops bleep bleep coffee cup bleep the Warsaw Pact bleep!" Then It'sOnica sobs about their friendship. Krusta gets a little misty over this bit about the beauty of their relationship, and tells It'sOnica to "take Bunky" with her to the top. "They sold their soul to the devil!" It'sOnica announces, then runs off, sobbing, to the porch. Krusta sort of shakes her head and opens the door.