Big Brother
Lamer Vs. Lamerer

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
He Blinded Me With Science

HOW THAT GOES

Jeff: "Brendon, are you going to keep Rachel in?"
Brendon: "No. It's me that's coming off."

Brendon's Diary: "Just kidding, I'm using it on Rachel. I am a mastermind!"

Jeff & Jordan: "That was... Inconclusive."

BRENDON & RACHEL VISIT DANI IN HER BIKINI

Brendon: "I am taking myself off the block. I am not lying!"
Daniele: "Sure, whatever."
Brendon: "So let's cut a deal!"
Daniele: "But um, right now it's before PoV. I don't have any power."
Rachel: So much crazy eyes right now. She looks like she wants to eat Daniele's unicorn.

Brendon: "You should replace me with Lawon. That is the power play."
Daniele: "I... See your logic?"
Brendon: "Also, I will destroy you from inside or outside the house, so you'd better put it all behind us and trust each other and make a deal."
Daniele: "Sure, Lucy. I'll totally kick that football."

It's so fucking dumb. They're so stupid. Oh, suddenly it's about deals and trust, just like every time your brutish bodies and even more brutish bullying don't get you what you want? I don't understand how they didn't team up against these assholes in the first week. It's not even that they're awful, it's that you're there to play a game and they're... Not. They think they are, but they're not. They're there to react to sounds and light and whatever is in front of their stupid faces right now. It's like, How many times does your brother have to knock over the Monopoly board before you go, "You... Are not good at this game. It's not fun. I am not going to play with you anymore. You are evicted from this game."

Daniele: "You're not even going to remember having this conversation anyway, so fuck it. Sure."
Rachel: Begins to gnaw on her own arms and hands.

PoV CEREMONY

Brendon: "I have efficiently destroyed Daniele's entire game. It is going to be so awesome how I turn this house upside down. Everything that ever happens is the biggest thing that ever happened in Big Brother History. As long as it happens to me."

Daniele: "I hate that Brendon's taking himself off the block. Good thing I don't have to name the replacement nominee before he pulls his big ridiculous drama queen game-changer where he proves once and for all what a fucking idiot he is."
Jeff: "I am not really clear what's going on at this time."

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Big Brother

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