Big Brother
Big Brother

Episode Report Card
Wing Chun: B- | 487 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Mike Thinks Mike Is Great

Now it's Errol Flynn's turn to vote. He sold out his alliance and could get reprisal for it from Mike or Kail. Who's the bigger threat? He thinks Mike.

That's all it takes, but in case you were wondering: Daniele votes to evict "Michael," and Jessica votes to evict him as well.

When Julie tells Mike he's out, he gets up robotically, not looking at anyone, and goes straight for a (probably fake) plant in the doorway, pulling out flowers for the girls, some of whom "aaaaaaw." Eh. He starts shaking people's hands, and then the girls crowd in for hugs, and then Dick hands him his bag and he heads out, all cold and clipped, to the Chenderdome.

We briefly cut back inside the house, where Kail is giving Dustin a huge hug (and crying, natch), and then rolls off to Nick, who gives her one arm for like three seconds, staring straight ahead like fucking Terminator, and then Kail is whimpering and hugging Jameka. It's kind of a pitiful display, but the cameras are soon distracted from it by Dick accusing Jen of having voted to evict Kail. Jen denies it, but in the same blasé tone of voice she always uses, so it's not terribly convincing, even though it's the truth. This goes on for a while, with the camera focusing on Eric staring down at the floor trying not to get caught out. Hang tough, big guy! And fix your damn collar!

Chenderdome. Julie claims that "people on the internet" have been saying that Mike's clowning at the Veto Competition was "the dumbest move ever." Oh man, that's going to be awkward the next time Mike has the internet over for bridge. Also, shut up, Julie. "People on the internet" say everything. It's not like we vote as a bloc. Anyway, she's just setting Mike up again to remind us that he's great, though he also hints that the real reason behind his ouster had nothing to do with taunting Dick. (I briefly consider looking up whatever he might be talking on a feed transcript, and then remember that I don't actually care that much.) But since Mike can't get into that, he returns to his theme of the rest of the episode: loyalty, integrity, fraternity, liberty, awesomnity. Goodbye messages: Zach is bummed that Mike got voted out, and repeats that Mike played with loyalty and integrity, in case you don't get Mike's newsletter. Kail's sorry that Mike got bounced. Dustin pissily says that Mike's been in the house four weeks, and Dustin knows four things about him: "You're from Wisconsin, you like planes, you're a model, and you eat a lot of meat." Funny, that last one's the only thing Mike knows about Dustin. OH! Amber thinks Mike will be "the perfect husband" someday and thinks he's great. "Hi Mike, it's Jen." He...can see you. Jen hopes Mike doesn't get to see the message -- though she doesn't hope it so hard that she voted for Kail or anything. She also repeats the talking points, for Christ's sake. Dick says that for Mike to "put [him]self out there" was stupid. Shut up, Sacky Sales. Please let Dick be the next to go; I'm so sick of his scrotum face.

Big Brother

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