Big Brother

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M. Giant: B | Grade It Now!
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The Godmother

April has bonded with a stuffed poodle named Holly, which is apparently her best friend in the house now except for Ollie. The others play keep-away with it in the yard, upsetting April. Unfortunately, she can see the fun of it and denies us the spectacle of a full-on meltdown. Dammit.

So instead, let's see some more of Ollie and April's showmance, shall we? They lie in bed as though they're superglued together from head to toe, talking about how they want to stay together after leaving the house. At one point, Ollie half-jokingly asks her to marry him. "You got that on TV, right?" April asks the night-vision camera.

The editors cue up some Godfather-type music as Renny calls Michelle up to the HoH room to watch her eat her snacks and try to cut a deal and make veiled threats. Renny warns Michelle that their numbers are dwindling, and nobody should feel safe. Michelle claims to respect Renny, who swigs her wine and somehow makes the editors cue up clips of Renny's possible targets. Notice how Michelle didn't get so much as a crumb in that scene? So much for Renny's southern hospitality.

For the food competition, the guests are divided into red and blue teams, according to which color of giant bow they pick. Apparently there's going to be a restaurant motif, because the extra player is going to be a "server." Keesha volunteers, probably to challenge herself to see if she can do that with clothes on. They go to the backyard wearing fake tuxedo t-shirts, and Renny explains the rules: it's a version of rock-paper-scissors, but with slop, pig ears and crickets. And whoever wins each round has to actually eat what they write down in order to win a point for their team.

Dan goes first against Memphis, and beats him by saying "crickets" when Memphis says "slop." Dan says grace before downing the bugs like a champ and winning a point for the red team. Acting like a weak player doesn't apply to food competitions, apparently. Michelle goes up against Ollie, and pulls a Vizzini on Ollie by figuring that Ollie will assume she'll act on her previously stated enjoyment of pig ears. But she beats Ollie's slop with her crickets, and sucks the insects down, winning another point for red. In the next round, Jerry has to eat a bowl of slop for the blue team, and barely gets it down without vomiting. This despite having been on slop since before joining AARP. Then it's Dan vs. Memphis again, and this time Memphis ends up eating pig ears, tying the game. Michelle beats Ollie again, this time by going for the pig ears (never challenge a Portuguese person in a battle of wits!). April goes against Jerry and wins by going with pig ears, which is a bit of a problem for her, since she's a vegetarian. Jerry DRs that he's been on slop for 19 days, and doesn't want to do it any more, but when April scarfs down her pig ears, it's official: Memphis, Ollie, and Jerry are on slop, while Renny and the others get food. Renny gives the losers the good news that America has voted on the food item they can have to supplement their slop: it's giant lollipops. When they are allowed back inside the house, there are, like, a hundred of them all over the dining room table. "It looks like Pee-Wee's Playhouse," Ollie says happily, like he's not going to be sick of these sugary ping-pong paddles in two days. You can't spell "lollipops" without "slop," after all.

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Big Brother

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