Big Brother
Sayonara, Chiara

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
You Reap, You Sow, You Weep, You Go

Chiara and Danielle talk in the Big Bed Room. Kiki says that if she and Roddy were nominated, she would go for the veto and remove him, which would free him up to vote for her opponent, and she knows that Danielle will always vote in Chiara's favour, so she would have at least two votes to stay. Danielle tells Kiki she thinks Roddy's going up, but she doesn't know who will go up against him.

Roddy takes his turn dishing about strategy, saying in the diary room that he currently is "without a tactic" -- he's just trying to survive the week, and then he'll think about what to do next. Probably a good thought, and interesting from the guy the rest of them all believe has some sort of overarching master plan that moves ever forward with sickening inevitability, like some gargantuan suburban mall construction project.

Amy and Marcellas revel in being back in the HoH room together. They sing, they dance, they gossip, they do their nails, they trash-talk, blah blah blah. I want to find all of this a lot of fun, but I sort of don't anymore. They sadly seem united in pettiness in a way I just can't get into. They've gone from being the girls in high school who got picked on and therefore became bitterly funny to being the girls in high school who were always trying to make the top tier by being as mean as possible to the girls who were even less popular than they were. It's a little ugly.

Time for the food challenge. This week's competition involves a closed tornado booth (like a phone booth with a wind machine -- you know what I'm talking about), in which you grab flying money and food vouchers and stuff them in your bathing suit. In order to create equal footing for the men and the women, the boys are put into Speedos. Not the worst or most Speedo-like Speedos, but Speedos nevertheless. Marcellas says it made him look like "a fat girl in underwear." Oh, that Marcellas. What would he do without fat jokes? Nothing like transforming yourself into the new Don Rickles to keep things fresh. With a hearty introduction from Roddy, Gerry reveals himself in all his pale glory, and everyone laughs. (Gerry is the best sport ever about how much crap they give him, incidentally.) Jason then appears in the doorway of the HoH room with no agenda except waggling his ass in Marcellas's face, which is pretty cute and funny. I love the part where Bible Belt Boy flirts with the gay black man from Chicago while they both wear purple swimsuits. It's like a bizarre World War II movie set in Polynesia and featuring the most diverse platoon of all time. Danielle, apparently bored with the word "scandalous," declares the swimsuits "blasphemous." Which is stupid. Unlike "scandalous," which was just old.

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Big Brother




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