Big Brother

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A Knight in Shining Vomit

Matt nominated Rachel and Brendon this week, and Ragan busts out a "Hallelujah" in the Diary Room over the news. Brendon DRs that it was a stupid move (by which he means one he doesn't agree with), and Matt is going to need to look out for whichever one of them stays. I'm sure Matt is terrified. And Rachel is tearfully wondering how she became the bad guy with all the men in the house. And whose fault is it that all those women got picked off, Rachel? After the nominations, Brendon tries to cheer Rachel up in the bedroom, but nothing's going to improve their mood like going out to the kitchen and acting pissy to everyone. Kathy is sitting with Hayden, Matt and Ragan, which sends Rachel into an angry salad-chopping frenzy. Britney offers to talk her down, still playing the fake ally, while the rest of the house assures each other that the one who stays won't be much of a threat next week.

Brendon and Rachel feel bad for themselves in a bedroom, and Brendon offers to win the Power of Veto and use it on her. There's a clip in the DR of Rachel whining in the DR, and Brendon promises to protect her, because that's what knights do. I'm going to go throw up now.

There's a mini-bowling alley in the backyard, presumably to let them practice for the PoV competition. The houseguests take turns doing some practice bowling. Except for Rachel, who stomps off to cry when Ragan offers her a turn. Brendon tries to go buck her up, but she's so entrenched in victim mode that she tells both him and the DR that she can't "give any more." Brendon threatens to pick her up and drag her out there, but ultimately she goes out and starts killing it with the practice bowls. The two of them are still out there practicing until after 4:00 AM, when everybody else has gone to bed. It's very Rocky. I just hope the PoV competition is at seven the next morning and they're too exhausted to play.

Matt calls the houseguests together to pick the players, and Brendon talks big about handing over the medal right now. The four automatic veto players stand at the front of the room: Head of House Matt, nominees Brendon and Rachel, and Ragan, who won the Veto Ticket last week. Matt draws Kathy's name, Rachel draws Britney, and Brendon draws Houseguest's choice. Which, since the only people left sitting are members of the Brigade, isn't much of a choice at all. He picks Enzo for sucking at competitions.

The front doorbell rings, and in walk Jeff and Jordan from Big Brother 11 and The Amazing Race 16, dressed in matching hot pink bowling shirts. Are they stalking me or something? Enzo DRs that Jeff would be a member of the Brigade, complete with the nickname "Pretty Boy." Jeff and Jordan do a joint DR in which they report that they're still a couple. I was worried. They'll be hosting the PoV competition. It's called "Lover's Lane," and the bowling alley has been augmented with a theme that looks like Valentine's Day threw up. Jeff and Jordan talk about how this is the first time they ever hosted a PoV. "Probably because no one liked us in the house," Jordan says. Still with the razor-sharp analytical mind, that one. They explain the rules: each player knocks down as many pins as they can in 45 seconds, then picks another person to challenge. Whichever of the two knocks down the least pins is eliminated in that round, and then on to the next round.

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Big Brother

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