Big Brother

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B | Grade It Now!
Ball Buster

Farewell messages: Lane admits Ragan made a great argument, but not enough to break his loyalty to Hayden and Enzo. Britney says she couldn't save him with her one vote and would have only hurt herself trying, and says she's sorry he'll have to go to the jury house with "Rachel's loud, disgusting cackle." Enzo calls him too emotional, "complaining a lot, crying a lot," and asks for his vote in the final two in the same breath. Which, it's a little surprising he has any breath left after blowing that dog whistle so hard. Hayden gives Ragan props for representing the gay community, and Ragan's off to the jury house.

It's time for the HoH competition. The backyard is a winter wonderland, with fake snow and giant nutcrackers everywhere, and not all that much actual wonder, admittedly. The three non-Lane houseguests are positioned behind chicken-wire fences with an outline of a Christmas tree on the front of them. They'll have to reach through the holes between the wires, using just their fingertips to maneuver little glass bulb ornaments into position, and then a star on top. It begins. And given that this is all about fiddly little movements, moving slowly and carefully and accomplishing very little in a long time, this may well be the most boring competition ever. Fortunately Britney keeps dropping and/or breaking hers, which provides some amusement.

It's still going on after the last ad break, and as Julie plugs the next week's worth of shows. They'll include an eviction on Wednesday and the beginning of the final HoH competition on Thursday. Yay, after an interminable season, the interminable finale is almost in sight! But for now, back to the interminable HoH competition, where Hayden's in the lead with five ornaments in place, Enzo has three, and Britney's got a paltry one. And now it's snowing, which still doesn't make this interesting. Except that the thick litter of dropped ornaments in front of Britney is mildly amusing. I bet if I had HD, I could look into them and see her and Lane sitting side by side -- at Wednesday's eviction ceremony.

M. Giant is a Minneapolis-based writer with a wife, a son, and a number of cats that seems to have settled at around two. Learn waaaay too much about him at Velcrometer, follow him on Twitter, or just e-mail him at m.giant[at]

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Big Brother




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