Big Brother
The Blonder Of Two Evils

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The Early-Out Curse

Will also asks Howie about strategy, but they don't get very far, mostly because Howie is Howie, and he's less interested in strategy than in comparing chests and discussing Jedi trivia. Will explains in the DR that he refers to the S6 people as "Sea-Sick," and he's hoping to "ride [Howie] like Seabiscuit" right into the middle of it. I have about as much fondness for nicknaming other people's friends as I have for nicknaming your own friends, so, seriously: shut up, Will.

Janelle is eating again, some more, as she and Jase meaninglessly chat about Alison, who disappears into the HoH room and peeks on the spy screen. She watches the HoHs for a while, mutters, "I guess it's time for me to go play stupid," and leaves. She DRs that she blames Janelle for being nominated, and adds, "I fucking hate her." Downstairs, when Jase and Janelle are gone, Alison putters in the kitchen while Janelle relaxes outside. "Bitch," Alison mutters. "She's lucky this week. If I survive, your ass is mine...Busto." I certainly hope Janelle was prepared for that one to come back on her, because...it only makes sense.

It is around here that I start to realize what the saddest thing is about this season, which is that you're never going to know the vast majority of what causes shit between these people. You probably know that reality-show contestants -- especially, but not exclusively, CBS reality-show contestants -- are a horrifyingly incestuous group, and I guarantee you that in many cases, this house is not their first experience with each other, and it's certainly not their first experience knowing about each other. They date people who know each other, they go to Survivor people's birthday parties and barbecues, and they go to the same charity dog-washing events. I'm not saying there aren't ones who aren't joiners, because there are. But there are, I promise you, a bazillion dynamics floating around the house that have absolutely nothing to do with anything you're ever going to see. For example (not because I have any evidence; I'm saying for example), there could easily be lots of reasons Alison doesn't like Janelle that have more to do with some bar where somebody said something about somebody's friend than with who's aligned with who. I'm not saying those women specifically, I'm saying generally. These are not clean slates, even accounting for the people who played in the same season. They're connected through all that dumb Fishbowl bullshit, and Bravo reunions, and all the cross-seasonal dating and so forth, and it's just a big old hole where the explanation of why lots of them really hate or like each other should be. It's the very fact that you can believe you're watching relationships form and you know what the ingredients are that usually makes it interesting. This way, it's...weirdly unsatisfying.

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Big Brother

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