Big Brother
The Inaugural Boot

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C+ | Grade It Now!
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When Gerry Met Salad...

Now it's time for an additional nomination. Her hand forced, Lisa replaces Marcellas with Amy, weepily declaring that she knows Amy the least, of everyone who's left. Amy giggles and claps at being nominated. She bounces over to the nominee chair like she just made the finals at a pageant. Everyone has tons of respect for the fact that she handles it like a pro.

Amy and Lori both say they feel confident and safe about being on the block. Outside, Marcellas says he's a winner all day. Later, in the Aquarium Room, Marcellas makes a comment about how "everyone thought this would be easy," and Josh throws back a typical asshole remark about how Marcellas was the one who didn't make it easy the first two days. Marcellas, despite the fact that he's working with the grass skirts they used in that absurd luau competition yesterday, doesn't come over and strangle Josh with a piece of one of them. "I think Josh is the antichrist," Marcellas diary-rooms. He goes on to talk about the house "as an organism," and how it has "a cancer" on it. In the form of Josh, of course. (And Gerry! Because of the salad! And his hands! In the salad! Oh, sorry.) Josh refuses to speak to Gerry, irate that Gerry suggested that Josh picked on Marcellas because he's black and because he's gay, rather than because Josh is a weasel.

The episode closes with the Goobers' flatly stating that Gerry is now finished for good. Josh declares that Gerry "wrote himself a ticket home." Lisa says that Gerry's obviously gone unless he wins HoH, in which case he could survive one more week. Have they all forgotten that there are other people who could potentially win HoH who might rather nominate them than Gerry? Lisa tells Josh and Eric that the reason Gerry is sitting outside alone is that "he feels retarded." Excuse me, but what grade were you in the last time you heard someone insult a person they didn't like by calling them "retarded"? Was it before or after you lost your last baby teeth? Honestly, Lisa, your emotional age had better get its ass in gear, because your biological age is way in the lead and is, frankly, going to lap it before long. Josh says that Gerry is a "marked man."

Thursday. The Julie Chen Exposed Rib Watch this week is at about seven. Julie kicks off the festivities by reminding us that Lisa is head of household. And that she nominated Lori and Marcellas, and that Gerry vetoed Marcellas, and that Lisa put up Amy instead. Because they didn't just tell us that during the previouslys. Except for the part about how they didn't, because THEY DID. The show proper opens with a shot of the lizards, which slides over to a shot of Gerry.

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Big Brother

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