Big Brother
These Two? Really?

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Farewell, Evil One

That night, under a full moon, the three men wait by the door to see who comes through the gate next. "It would break my heart to see Danielle walk through that door," James says. But walk through the door she does. James looks legitimately very unhappy, and he retreats into the house, while Marcellas hollers, "Nooooo!" and runs to hug Danielle. Of course, as Danielle hugs James, she says, "I got scumbagged." By which she means "I lost." It turns out those are the same thing. Danielle tells us that she was sort of touched by how shocked and unhappy the guys looked like they were to see her, and it made her realize they were really pulling for her. Or that they hate Will and Mike, in the alternative, not that she adds that part. The four members of the jury drink a toast, and Howie just hopes that George will show up next. I think Howie may still be holding a small grudge; what do you think? As it happens, George is making his way into the house as we speak. And, for some unknown reason, he's wearing a wrestling helmet. When Howie tries to throw some random bully bullshit at George for breaking their alliance, George takes it in good humor and just laughs, "Guess who went out before me, Howie?" Howie doesn't want to guess. "Who was going to waste an HoH on a fat chicken?" Howie says back with an obvious angry edge. Such a good sport.

George produces the DVDs of the evictions of himself and Danielle, and the little group starts watching, and immediately, Howie starts in talking about how "ugly" Erika is. Does Howie not know what...Howie looks like? Because I get that some people are into those gym bods and everything, but face-wise? Howie is not good-looking. Howie is fug. I don't get where he got the impression that he was gorgeous. Anyway, when George makes a joke after his nomination to Erika about how he might be "the strongest player" and Erika jokes back, "You're pretty up there," Danielle turns and coldly says to George, "She never thought that." Ha! Oh, Danielle, you're such a daring truth-teller.

Howie continues to hassle George, and much like Marcellas once did, George tells Howie to shut up, because he doesn't have to listen to Howie's bullshit anymore. "Georgie," says Howie, "Did I make it very clear in this season that if people want to betray me, they'd be personally attacked?" George stares straight ahead and repeatedly tells Howie to shut up. "What part of that didn't you understand?" Howie says menacingly, and now George turns to Howie, a hint of warning in his tone, and says, "Shut up." I think it's safe to say that George has officially had enough. Danielle senses this, and she finally reaches over to try to put a stop to it. "You shut your fat ass, you fat-ass!" Howie yells at George. It's a good thing that the people Howie doesn't like are all fat-asses, because I don't know what he would do to deal with anyone else. George chastises Howie for being "a ten-year-old," to which Howie responds, "You suck!" Well, I guess George will have to take back that insult. Finally, George is done, and he gets up and tries to leave, but Howie keeps yelling. Danielle finally takes over. "Are you mad because he outplayed you?" she says to Howie. George insists that's exactly what it is, but Howie says, "Not at all!" Convincing! He turns back to George. "You suck too bad to get nominated. You suck too bad to waste an HoH on." Howie continues yelling. George offers Howie a "sucker," by which he means either a pacifier or a lollipop; both are funny. Howie -- I swear, I am not making this up -- rips off a voodoo doll of George that he has been wearing around his neck, and he hurls it to the floor. There are moments when I picture the craft projects I could have done; the letters to friends I could have written; the toilet-paper prison inventions I could have come up with instead of watching this show.

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Big Brother

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