Big Brother
Twelve…No, Fourteen! Fourteen Crazies!

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 1 USERS: D+
YOU GRADE IT
And...They're Off!

Howie takes out Danielle, so Janelle manages to -- by doing absolutely nothing -- become the second HoH. I don't like these competitions where it's all about who decides to take you out or not, so I was pleased that Jase at least did something. Janelle did nothing, but hey, there she is anyway. I have to say, hearing Howie refer to his friends as "Jedis" is going to get incredibly old incredibly fast. You have to win, or at least seem ultra-sneaky, to be a Jedi. You can't just...be there for a while, save yourself with a few vetoes, and finish third. Anyway, the big winner is Janelle, who's jumping up and down in spite of essentially being ballast throughout that challenge.

Julie reminds Jase and Janelle that they will have to agree on the nominations, or else it will be the two of them up for eviction. Alison DRs that it sucks that Janelle is the other HoH besides Jase and that they have to agree, since Jase would undoubtedly have gone after Janelle's group, and obviously, she's not going to go along with that. Will DRs that he "can't wrap [his] brain around Janelle," and he adds that he suspects she'll nominate him. Danielle states the obvious, as usual: "Now is the time for those two to start playing on each other!" Only she says it like it's a secret. Oh, and she adds, "Let the games begin." Games, indeed! Games!

We come back from commercials, and Jase and Janelle are doing an uncomfortable joint DR that they're HoH together. They look to be enjoying this about as much as they would enjoy an extremely bad blind date. If you've ever overheard a very bad blind date (the one I overheard most recently involved a woman who was horrified that her younger relatives called her "Barb" instead of "Aunt Barb"), you know how painful that can be. They invite the rest of the group to visit the HoH room with them. When they get there, the room is decked out with the usual comfortable beds and cookies and whatnot. Janelle articulately says, "The upstairs HoH room is a completely different feeling. You walk in there, and you're like, 'Wow, it's awesome.'" It's almost like being there, isn't it, when she makes it that vivid? Jase shows everyone pictures of his girlfriend/fiancée and her daughter, and he tells us that he's no longer just playing for himself; he's playing for the lady and the kid. While I don't entirely buy the transformation of Jase just yet, I will say that with some people, falling in love with an adult does a lot to vault them into adulthood. The group admires the room, and the tub, and Mike adds, "When I won HoH, I got a bag of peanuts and a comforter." Heh. He's a tool, but that was moderately funny, and true. It did kind of used to be the Doritos room. Will rather idiotically interviews that if he won, he wouldn't even sleep there, because it's a "waste of energy." I immediately note that Will is at his least appealing when he is trying too hard in a way he can't sell as satire, and that? Was it. I have a theory that preposterous broad strokes have to be done in a way that looks effortless to the point where you can't believe the balls-out awesomeness. [Two names for you: (1) Jeff Buckley; (2) Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan. If you know what I mean, then you know exactly what I mean.] You can't go all pinchy, and when Dr. Will is pinchy, he is not fun.

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Big Brother

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