Big Brother

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I Choose Me

Kristen's next target is Britney, who is also not stunned at the possibility that there's a dude alliance forming, which is going to eventually leave Britney in the vulnerable position of last woman standing.

Kristen then has to make her pitch to Brendon in the HoH room, and he doesn't seem entirely unreceptive to what she's saying. "Ultimately it boils down to trust," he narrates in the DR. We'll see what Rachel has to say about that if he goes against her in the vote.

Julie says we're about to name the most powerful HoH ever. Does that person get to leave the house or something?

After the ads, she gets the houseguests on the living room viewscreen, where she tells Kristen and her unitard that she's "lookin' groovy" and asks Hayden whether he wouldn't have rather had that than solitary confinement. Hayden regrets giving up the five thousand, and maintains that she looks better in it than Hayden would have. Although I think the wig would have been an improvement over Hayden's actual hair. Julie shows them a clip of the luxury competition with the police car obstacle course, specifically Enzo's overenthusiastic celebration at the end. Everybody has a laugh, except the people watching. Julie puts Britney on the spot, asking her who is the hardest houseguest to live with. Britney outs Ragan as a toxic farter, and Ragan basically says that who smelt it dealt it. Wow, that took a sophomoric turn. But I guess that while Britney's canny enough not to give a sincere answer, it would have been too much to ask to point the finger at herself. That would make it hard for other people to pull it.

Julie introduces a clip of Kristen and Hayden making out in bed. "It's weird to think my mom's watching," Hayden says, which is just what you want to hear when you're getting hot and heavy between the sheets. And so we meet Hayden's mom in Tempe, who totally disapproves of his showmance on every level. "I would tell him, think with the head that's on your shoulders," she says.

There are like nine chicks watching their friend Kristen back home in Philadelphia, and one of them reveals that Kristen has a boyfriend. And there he is, watching a make-out scene like he's one of those jilted boyfriends on Temptation Island. The subtitles introduces him as Steve, Kristen's boyfriend, and then an "EX-" gets dropped in there like we're watching Burn Notice an hour early. He's obviously pretty upset. "In my opinion, it's over," he tells us. "She's got quite a mess to clean up when she comes back," he threatens. He also says that he's a 31-year-old man, unlike Hayden the 24-year-old kid, which is a pretty mature remark for a guy who just broke up with his girlfriend via a national television interview that she probably won't even see for a while.

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Big Brother

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