Big Brother
Washing Their Hands Of Gerry

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Miss Alli: C+ | Grade It Now!
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"Pretty" Is What It's About

Danielle whines like a baby in the DR about how much she loves Kiki. Would that be the Kiki of "We'll get her in due time, Lisa" fame? Or the Kiki of "you ain't foolin' nobody, we're foolin' you" fame? Or the Kiki of "Gee, thanks for voting to keep Lisa in the house, even though I know you didn't" fame? Which of the many Kikis you've schemed against are you now preparing to boohoo about, Ms. Danielle?

Jason talks about having given Kiki a "real kiss" on her way out the door. Oh, please. In blue and white, we see what I would refer to as a megapeck, sort of a peck on the mouth that takes a half-second instead of a mere snap of the fingers. If some guy I spent seven weeks lusting after promised me a "real kiss" on my way out the door and delivered that? I would poke him in the throat with a pen. I'm just saying. Roddy laments that Kiki made the endless, meaningless, pointless hours in the Big Brother house just a little easier to bear. I'm sure the rest of the houseguests are also disappointed by her departure, in that every minute Roddy spent curled up in the hammock with her was one less minute spent discussing the rules of succession to the throne in assorted ancient monarchies or the science behind lint. Roddy insists that he really will miss her, all appearances to the contrary.

Now, Amy whines for about an hour and a half about how people are sad about Chiara leaving, and she just cannot understand why anyone is sad. After all, it's only a game. Of course, when she schemed to get rid of Chiara, it was about honor and respect and insulting people's morality, but for people who actually enjoyed Chiara at least part of the time and at least felt bad about her crying on her way out the door? Yeah, then it's supposed to be about a game. Coming from anyone besides the incredibly self-absorbed, unbelievably petty Amy, this speech she delivers about how it's a game and people shouldn't walk around like it's a funeral would probably strike me as refreshing. From her, it just makes me want to say (as Snowmobile Boy does, from time to time), "Get off my side!"

Meanwhile, a tearful Roddy (breaking out the crocodile tears, in my opinion) asks Jason to open his bag, because he knows that Chiara left him her "woobie," the security blanket she's had since childhood. Hmm, to send Kiki off with one last "leaving a trail of bedding everywhere you go" joke, or no? Nah. He goes on quite a bit about how touched he was that she left the blanket for him, and how wonderful a gesture it is, and how now he thinks it was "absolutely beautiful." Now he's "proud that he got to be part of her life." Hmm, to send Kiki off with one last "being part of her life isn't that valuable, according to the rules of supply and demand" joke? Nah.

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Big Brother

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