Big Blue Chair of Marry Me, Hardy. "I don't need to put up with that bullshit, living with a goddamned third-grader. A dangerous third-grader. He's a threat to everyone around him," Hardy tells us, looking disgusted.
Nicole and Sheryl cuddle on the Big Blue Chair of Hot Girl-on-Girl Action, and talk about what a frightening tool Justin is. Sheryl comments that she thinks there's a real possibility that he might "pop someone."
Justin tells the camera that "they" (the producers, I assume), are always telling him that he "can't, like, beat somebody up, or [he] can't, like, sexually force [him]self on somebody." He rolls his eyes like this is the silliest thing he's ever, ever heard.
Julie Chen seriously informs the audience that "the final straw for the producers" was in the "knife incident" in the kitchen. Now, I've read all about this, but I'm not on the live feed so much, because I'm on a 56K modem, and also, I'm cheap. Anyway, from what I've heard, it was pretty shocking. Let's get to it: My sweet Krista, whom I'm beginning to suspect has very, very bad taste in men, is sprawled out on the kitchen's butcher block island. ["Ew! Don't they prepare food on that?" -- Wing Chun] She's very drunk. She and Justin kiss. His tooth gets snagged on her lower lip, and tears a bloody hole in her mouth. Not really. Actually, she murmurs something unintelligible, and rests her head on the table. Justin gets a carpet sweeper, and holds it like a baseball bat, resting on his shoulder. "Would you get mad if I cracked you over the head with this?" he asks, swinging it toward her. Krista points out that "his mama would." I suspect his mama is waiting for him at the train station with her own bat in hand, frankly. They kiss again. Watch out for the tooth, Krista! Also, what the hell are you doing? I know you're drunk, but it would take a shovel and a handful of barbiturates to get me to swap spit with Justin, who's crossed the kitchen and grasped a large butcher knife. "Would you get mad if I killed you?" he asks. CBS cuts back to Julie Chen, who tells us that Justin held the knife to Krista's throat and said to her, "Seriously, would you get mad if I killed you?" According to Julie, Krista and Justin then kissed for a while more. When Justin removed the knife from Krista's neck, she asked him to put it back. He did; they kissed. Then he put the knife back in the drawer. Justin? A lunatic. Krista? Lay off the sauce, girl. ["Both of you? Therapy." -- Wing Chun] The producers cut back to the kitchen in time for us to hear this disembodied voice calling Justin to the Diary Room. Justin grins and hitches up his drawers. "Oh boy, we got problems," he says. "We've got problems. I think it might have been that knife? To your neck?" Wow, Justin, do you think?