Meanwhile, at home, Bill broods about all the secrets his wives are keeping from him. So do you think he'll applaud Margene's honesty when she tells him she was set up with an adorkable Mormon accountant? (Seriously, I don't know what it is, but I think Chad's as cute as a tub full of baby ducks. Maybe it's because I admire people who are so comfortable with their nerdly selves, they've managed to become a counterculture of one. ["Word!" -- Wing Chun]) Barb comes in and tells Bill that she's got some thoughts on how the family can dig its way out of Nicki's debt. Before she can say something quasi-sensible like "We'll cut off her hair and sell it to fetishists on Ebay" or "We'll throw a yard sale with all of her stuff" or "We'll sell one of her kidneys," Bill has pulled the passive-aggressive move of turning on the TV. Barb would like it if Bill could patch it up with Nicki before the barbecue. Otherwise, the engagement party's going to turn into an advertisement against The Principle, plus Barb will have the mortification of being a bad hostess. Bill grimly says, "Oh, we're celebrating." Never has the prospect of steamed crustaceans cracked open to accordion music seemed so threatening. Barb tells Bill that she'd like him to slow things down a bit. He's very tense, and she "worries sometimes about the price [they're] all paying for success." Bill protests, "If I don't keep constantly moving the ball forward, we would sink under our bills!" I would have more sympathy if we weren't looking at a guy who just brought home a brand-new car, and bought three brand-new houses, and...you get the point. Barb does add that Nicki's contribution to the situation certainly doesn't help matters. Bill tells Barb, "You let things get totally out of control around here." This is the point where I paused the TiVo and said, "The reason I'd make a lousy Henrickson is the minute Bill said that to me, I'd rip off his arm and beat him to death with it." From the depths of the couch, the husband replied, "That's a lot of widows you'd be making."
Anyway, Barb calmly tells Bill, "That's not fair. You have to be reasonable and you have to calm down." Bill screams that it's hard to stay cool when he finds out that one of his wives has sunk the family sixty large in debt. He's going to love it when he finds out that another one of his wives is apparently back in the dating pool. Bill adds that Barb's not telling him is also not winning her any wife-of-the-year contests. Barb snaps back, "I was in a difficult position, Bill! I'm extremely relieved to be out of it. I don't like lies either. If I did, we'd still be meeting in hotels." Bill at least has the grace to look ashamed. Barb adds that she thought it was Nicki's place to tell Bill. He plaintively replies, "I'm your husband, aren't I?" Barb wearily replies, "Yes. But I'm married to two other people. You seem to forget that sometimes." Good for her for pointing that out -- it's just too bad she seems to be the only one who maintains that delusion.