Big Love
A Barbecue For Betty

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Sobell: B | Grade It Now!
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Burning Bosoms, Batty Bettys

Just then, JoJo comes in, accordion hanging off her torso like a musical threat. She eagerly says, "Hi, everyone! We're all so excited about Sunday and the engagement party with Betty. I was hoping that while I was here, I could practice a song I'm working on. It's a surprise!" After JoJo lilts this last part, Barb totally overreacts with the "Oh! Well, of course. Why don't you sit out by the pool and enjoy the fresh air." Heh. JoJo continues to sing Betty's virtues; apparently, she has this aura about her that's very calm and peaceful. As JoJo heads out, she burbles, "We fell in love with her right away. The vote was unanimous."

The lightbulb goes off over Margene's head. "What vote?" she asks Nicki. "I assume she means the vote to allow a new wife into the family," Nicki replies waspishly. Margene numbly asks if there was a vote on her, and in a move that is stunningly non-strategic considering it's coming from Nicki, the prairie power-shopper snaps, "We're not talking about that right now." She resumes pleading with Barb, and Margene intercepts the two of them to ask indignantly, "Wait. There was a vote on me?" Nicki begs for a switched night, and Barb tells Margene, "Yes! There was a vote on you. It was a major decision." Margene points out that nobody ever told her. (She has every right to be piqued, I think.) Barb then turns to Nicki and agrees to the switch. She stalks off as Nicki calls, "Put in a good word for me!" Margene dazedly says, "I can't believe there was a vote." Never one to pass up an opportunity to bully Margene, Nicki says, "What, you just thought you'd coasted in by charming the slacks off of Bill? Some of us had different criteria. We had to hash it over." Was one of the criteria "must have a FICO score above 700"? Because that could come in handy for Nicki right now.

Margie chases after Nicki, basically trying to suss out how these people she knew and liked could be evaluating her so dispassionately behind her back. Since she's dealing with a fellow spouse, it's not like she gets anywhere. You'd think that polygamists would actually place a high priority on honest communication skills, what with it being so much more of a pain in the ass to keep cover stories consistent for two to twelve other spouses. And yet, if anything, this crew is passionately committed to half-truths and evasions. Remind me again how this show is an alleged advertisement for the sweet polygamist lifestyle? Is is the part where the hot sex is followed by admissions of crazy debt, and that's followed by the discovery that the majority of your spouses knew about this before you did? Or is it the realization -- dangling temptingly out of reach -- that your communication skills are really weak if this is what your household's come to?

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Big Love

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