Ben is in shop class. His teacher makes sure they all snap on their goggles, then prepares to demonstrate what looks like a drill press. Whatever it is, it's got the biggest bit I've ever seen on any drill -- that sucker's three-quarters of an inch in diameter. The shop teacher lifts and releases a level, systematically driving the drill bit into the wood over and over and over and over and -- WE GET IT ALREADY. MY, IT'S AMAZING HOW A DRILL BIT PLUNGING INTO A BOARD CAN LOOK LIKE AN ERECT PENIS PENETRATING THE ORIFICE OF CHOICE.
There. Now I have rewarded this show's subtlety with an equally tempered response. Poor Ben's got a response too. It's in his pants. Fortunately for him, Jason, self-appointed Keeper of Ben's Boners, is there to look disapproving over this foul and unnatural phenomena. Whoever heard of teenagers having hormones anyway?
As Bill comes back into the office, Don is moistly hovering, just waiting to rain on Bill's parade with his flop sweat. "We have a problem," Don stage-whispers as Bill carries on about the stiff penalties that real estate fraud incurs. That problem would be Wendy. As she comes in and asks if she can talk to Bill, Don looks at him as if Wendy had just asked, "May I take this crossbow and use it to spear Don's head like a cocktail olive?"
After Don frets and murmurs his way out the door, Wendy sits down and begins monologuing: "I've rehearsed this in my head, but it's still hard. I saw Mr. and Mrs. Embry at Applebee's on Saturday. I was at the salad bar, with my mom, when they came in with two other women something wasn't right. Something not natural, I could tell. So when the two other ladies went to the rest room, I followed them. I know it was wrong, but I had to. They were talking about whose turn it was to cut Mr. Embry's hair!"
Oh, nice swerve, writers. I was totally hoping Wendy would be like, "And they began making out! Mr. and Mrs. Embry are friends with lesbians." Instead, Bill just looks at Wendy, and she finally bursts out, "They're polygamists!" Bill asks how Wendy couldn't just assume those women were merely someone's sisters. Wendy insists, "I know what I saw. It's against the church -- and the law." Enter obfuscation: Bill leans forward and says, "Wendy, as long as the people here are doing their jobs, what they do in our bedrooms is none of our concern. Don's always treated you with respect, and if I'm not mistaken, it was Peg that hired you. I tell you unequivocally: Don is not what you're saying he is. Everyone in the Henrickson Home Plus family is treated with respect. Hasn't that been your experience? So let's get off this subject. It's very unsavory." Wendy valiantly insists that she knows what she saw. Bill replies, "What you saw was an action: you didn't necessarily see the label you're putting on it." Wendy says, "I don't know what you're talking about?" Bill smiles and says, "Exactly." Heh.