Margene and the neighbors geek out about the music and scripture of the event they attended, and Pam starts this Big Rock Candy Mountain spiel about all the wonderful things awaiting Margene if she joins the Church, calling this the "Super-Ward," and lists like six things for every night in the week. Margene admits that it's all very excellent and not what she expected. "Gotcha!" yells Pam, and it's scary, but she says she was just kidding (false), and then Carl says "Converted! Converted!" a few times and laughs, (also false), Pam's like, "Seriously, come for Sacrament meeting tomorrow." Pam and Carl are...doing what you do, but they're doing it in a creepy way. I do like the idea of Margene -- the only adult who's neither LDS or in the cult, in the whole family -- joining the Church by random dint of living in Salt Lake. I like that a lot.

Grace Ann directs an aggressively blonde family to talk about how they're from Utah and would never leave Utah and how "Home Plus is us," and keeps pausing and pointing out her semiotic touches: a cougar that "says BYU without saying BYU," a cleverly subtle picture of Jesus, a buried shot of the Temple. She exclaims about how perfect the family is, and on the video she makes the guy say "Home Plus is us" like a hundred times until he says it perfectly. Bill loves it, Don's noncommittal about it, Miss Firecracker winks at Don. It's on.

At the White Birch hotel again, getting dressed, Barb's worried about Nicki, but of course Bill assumes it's about switching nights around, and he says it "won't last forever," but of course the point is that Barb, the best liar in Utah, is keeping at least one secret from all three of her spouses now. AND SHE'S THE NICE ONE! She continues to be stressed out and sweet to him, and he's not getting why she's weirded out, and she's not about to tell him, so it's sad, and as usual, Barb's got the weight of the world on her shoulders, which is how she likes it. He checks his messages, and gets the first of several effed-up voicemails from his mom, featuring such hits as "Bill, I Need To Talk To You (Gasp)" and "Get The Hell Out Of My House," "Bill, Please (Get Back, Don't You Dare)" "(Look Out) Crazy Woman's Got A Gun," and "Crash! (Don't You Touch Me!)"

Over sounds of shots being fired, Bill pulls up outside the El Royale motel, where showdown-y cello music plays over the sound of a billion polygamist Hendricksons camped out away from home. Bill's dad Frank walks up and talks trash as usual, asking what Bill did to tick off Roman, and Bill says it wasn't him, but of course it was, and Frank says -- laughably -- that he hopes Bill hasn't done anything to "jeopardize" his community position, like he has one, and generally just tells him that it's all his fault and that he's the ruination of all Hendricksons.