Margene's busy getting some breakfast into her kids when the phone rings. It's her mom. Margene has a mom! And her name is Ginger. This should be interesting. Ginger complains about the repainting going on in her one-bedroom apartment, and the fumes that are forcing her out of her home and into her car to come see Margene right now. "I'll be there by 3:00," she promises. As in, today. Barb just happens to be hucking a 72-roll package of toilet paper bigger than her torso into Margene's kitchen at this moment. You know, if Utah were really serious about driving out the polygamists, the first thing they would do is shut down all the Sam's Clubs and Costcos. "My mom's coming," Margene tells Barb, her face stricken. Hey, do you think Ginger knows?
Ginger doesn't know. A few minutes later, Bill and the rest of the wives have convened in Margene's kitchen. Bill says it's important to get it right this time; "Things didn't go so well with Barb's family," he understates. Plus Nicki's cut off from hers, so they have to make this one count. Bill proposes a plan whereby Ginger gets to know Barb and Nicki before they make the revelation. With sarcastic hopefulness, Nicki says, "And maybe we won't be damned to Hell. And I won't be referred to as 'the harlot.'" But even Nicki's sour attitude can't ruin this for Margene. She's too excited, which tells us right there that this is going to blow up huge.
Lois opens a can of peas in her cabin, and of course by "can of peas" we all know by now that we mean "wad of cash," right? She stuffs some bills in her purse, puts the rest back into a can with a plastic lid (as opposed to the others with the sealed metal tops), and gets ready to go. Everything incriminating is safely tucked away, but she still looks startled when her front door creaks open. When she sees that it's only her husband, Frank, her initial panic is replaced by a kind of relieved disgust. Frank slimes his way into the house, going on about some of Lois's recent expenditures that he's heard about. For instance, the hideous fur-lined coat she's wearing in the middle of summer, which I thought she'd picked up off of a curbside pile; a snowmobile (snowmobile?) and the "spicy new furniture!" Of course he's wondering where she got the cash for that. Lois tries to clam up, but it's not long before she's admitted that Bill's uncle Eddie helped her get a laundromat. "You're in cahoots with that cocksucker?" Frank asks. "That was 27 years ago," Lois says. "Now, could you just move off it?" As if moving off of things is anybody's strong suit around here. Frank's objection, of course, is that as Lois's husband, he's entitled to half of her possessions. Sucks to be first wife now, doesn't it, Lois? Lois just marches to the back door and tosses a crumpled fifty into the yard. Frank dashes out after it like a dog after a meatloaf, and Lois locks him out in the yard. Frank gives a forlorn, defeated through the window. Well, that was easy. Too easy, I'm thinking.