It's not TVâ¦it's one of the most awkward hours of HBO. Margene finally gets her aqua car, takes Ben out for a spin, sets up the "My dad's wife is so hot" plotline, and gets rejected by Lois. Barb gets tapped to deflect the neighbors' prying and only ends up looking even more suspicious; then she's got to fend off Joey, who's looking like he'd be happy to help brother Bill out by taking a surplus wife off his hands. Nicki throws Wayne a birthday party that he'll undoubtedly bring up in therapy years later. She lies, lies, lies like a rug about whether she knew Roman was going to be there, and stokes suspicions that she's the victim of parental abuse. Meanwhile, poor Sarah's left to entertain Rhonda; Roman's latest child bride may have sticky fingers, but the joke's on her -- without a cable and computer, there's no way that iPod Mini's going to be playing music for long. Looks like she's stuck listening to Roman sing "Big Rock Candy Mountain"!
Previously on Car Number Four, Where Are You?: Margene and Bill's loud morning sex inspires some off-schedule humping between Nicki and Bill; Nicki still has the nerve to get worked up when Barbara's morning quickie cuts into her official day with Bill. We find out that Don is also a polygamist, but his seething sexuality isn't enough to satisfy two of his wives. Ben is blinded by hormones, Sarah disapproves of this whole family set-up, and Margene really, really, really, really wants a car.
We get perky music to indicate that we're about to have a light-hearted sequence, and then we see Frank heading over to Lois's shotgun shack, setting out a lawn chair, then indicating he's brought his own shotgun to the shack.
Meanwhile, Nicki pulls up to The Monte Cristo, Utah's answer to Indian Wells. The scent of money practically makes Nicki giddy. We see her wandering around a banquet room with a facilities manager. He's explaining that it's 1200 square feet -- larger than my house, incidentally -- and there's room for 200 people. Nicki's thrilled to be able to get the place by 7 PM on the evening in question; she practically squeals when she gets the menu for the proposed early sit-down supper. She asks, "Is it possible to bring in our own entertainment?' The manager's all, "But of course, o mysterious pioneer with deep pockets. What did you have in mind?" and Nicki says, "I haven't decided. Either a magician, or a puppy party." The manager does the snooty-service-sector-employee equivalent of a double-take.
We see a little aqua car buzzing up to Henricksons' homes plus. There's a dealer sticker on the side, and I have to admit, my first thought is, "Wow, Nicki has gone completely around the bend." I admire people who give their insanity 110\% -- that bespeaks real commitment. Bill heads into Barb's house and says hi. She doesn't even look up from the dish she's scrubbing as she "hi"s him back. Then he crosses the bleak backyard and heads into Margene's house.
Barb finally looks up from the dish she's scrubbing when Margene begins screaming. That's funny -- it's not her day to have the too-loud sex, her expression suggests.
Cue a thrilled Margene dancing out of her house. Bill is grinning and jogging behind her. The two careen through Barb's kitchen -- another round of "Hi"s -- and then out to the driveway, where Margene has another screaming freak-out. We then see Margene sitting behind the wheel, looking thrilled. Bill tells her, "Now, remember: stewardship, not consumption, is the proper relation to material wealth." Margene grins at him. I suspect that sentence sounded to her like, "Woh-wah-woh-wah-who-wah wealth." And that last word is enough to inspire her to start humping Bill right there in the car. Naturally, this is when Barb opens the door to the garage.