Big Love
Oh, Pioneers

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Playing With The Big Kids

So then Bill goes outside, climbs a ladder, and starts fucking around with the phone box outside Nicki's house. When she asks what he's up to, Bill says it's "safer" for Roman if he can't call anyone. If Bill makes Roman any safer, he's going to kill him after all.

In the next scene, Lois has stopped by. She and Bill are arguing in the backyard as he realizes that she was the one who lobbied for his appointment as UEB chairman. "I don't want it," he insists. "You have no idea how much you've gummed up the works!" Our Lois? Nawww. Lois claims to have good political instincts: "I went way out on a limb as a girl for Barry Goldwater." Can both of those statements be true? Barb, who's gotten tired of listening to this from the kitchen, charges out into the yard and snaps at Lois that Bill wants out. Lois says that's too bad. "You can't just choose your own destiny," she mocks. Indeed, those books have gotten pretty hard to find. "This goes way back before your marriage," she adds dismissively. Bill speaks in Barb's defense, but Barb is quite capable herself of telling Lois to back off. Also, Lois is quite capable of refusing to do so. The doorbell rings, and Lois gives Barb an infuriating you gonna get that? look, like this means she wins the argument and Barb is some kind of idiot for having a functioning doorbell. Which is only half true. Barb goes, leaving Lois to continue haranguing Bill: "We've been waiting for this moment for thirty years...now don't be such a pansy." What could make this visit worse? Maybe if Lois were to, say, spot Adaleen vacuuming Nicki's carpet. Naturally, that's exactly what happens. "What is she doing here?" Lois demands. More to the point, where did they hide Adaleen's enormous Humvee?

Barb's visitor is Pam, who's stopped by to invite Barb over for a little dinner to thank her for her help. "With what?" Barb wonders blankly. So Pam tells Barb that Margene is having her baby, and calls it a "pre-insemination party." Ooh, fun! I'll bring the hollandaise sauce! Despite the earlier conversation with Margene, Barb clearly didn't realize that Margene had already agreed to have the kid, as her expression now indicates. And then Pam adds insult to injury by saying she understands from Margene that Barb is kind of in the same barren boat. "You ever think you wanna have two or three more? Have a regular-sized family?" Barb just blinks at her through a frozen smile, while I wish my remote had a "slam the door in that nosy asshole's face" button.

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Big Love

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