Big Love
Oh, Pioneers

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Playing With The Big Kids

Nicki's called Bill to her house, and she's complaining furiously about Sarah needing to be punished, while Sarah stands there looking miserable and embarrassed. Bill rubs that Nicki-spot on the back of his neck. He asks Sarah what she was thinking. Sarah apologizes to Nicki, which of course doesn't satisfy her and in fact sends her off into a fresh rant. Bill interrupts that by sending Sarah to her room, and she's only too happy to go, 18 or no. This turns out to be a mistake on Bill's part, because now Nicki turns her rage on Bill instead. She starts talking about putting Roman in a hotel, or taking him back to the compound. "Why not restore him to his devoted now?" she demands. Bill says Roman isn't going back, period. "I'm having your father and your brother removed from power, for good," he says. Well, at least Nicki isn't upset about Sarah anymore. Nicki asks what happens to her family, and her mom, and Bill just tells her, "It's over! He's finished!" Nicki insists that Roman's got 38 years left. "He said he'd rule until he's 118 and he will. He's the prophet!" Bill asks if she really believes that. Nicki, of course, does. Bill says Roman doesn't deserve the way Nicki scrambles for his love and approval. Nicki storms out of the kitchen, saying she won't let Bill do this. Bill goes out to the backyard. Is anyone going to remember to tell Sarah when she can come out of her room?

Things aren't going to go any better for Bill outside, because Barb intercepts him and brightly says, "Hi! Got a minute?" I don't care how many wives you have, it's never good when one of them says that to you. When Bill doesn't flee in panic, Barb asks, "Hey, when did you meet Ana?" Paralyzed by the shark-like smile that Barb's currently aiming at him, Bill plays dumb. Very, very dumb. "Margene said she introduced you and you expressed an interest in dating her," Barb reminds him. Bill sputters that Margene is exaggerating. Which is true! Margene didn't introduce them at all! He does admit that he bought pie from Ana. "Your memory seems to be returning," Barb mocks dangerously. Bill decides to cut off this line of questioning by saying he doesn't want to date Ana. "Have I answered your question?" he snaps impatiently. Barb: "Yes! Great! I'm glad to hear it! I don't want a fourth, Bill." Bill tries to put that off for now, and Barb insists that time will never come. "I. Don't. Want. A fourth." Bill, idiot that he is, decides to start digging his heels in as he reminds her that there are two other people in the marriage. "Yes," Barb smiles. "Oh, by the way, Margene's having the neighbor's baby." And with that, she stomps back to her house, leaving Bill to model his WTF Expression #872 all by himself.

So then Bill's telling Margene she can't be having neighbor babies, leading her to chirp some more about her "calling" and to point out that it's Nicki's turn to reproduce after this one. Bill also objects to Ana showing up and causing Barb to think a fourth wife is on the way. "That's absurd. Not going to happen," Margene chuckles, and tells Bill not to worry that Ana will say anything to anyone. Bill says he isn't worried, and also? Margene is having no neighbor babies. He leaves her standing there looking like he just told her she can't go to the cool girl's slumber party.

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Big Love

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