Big Love
Oh, Pioneers

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Playing With The Big Kids

Bill wins that round, because we next see them all upstairs, Adaleen shaving Roman with a straight razor that Bill must have picked up from the local SCA chapter. Bill offers to take over, like Roman would let Bill anywhere near his carotid artery with a sharp object, witnesses or no. Roman wants a telephone, but Bill says he's out of luck. Roman demands Bill's or Nicki's cell phone, but this discussion is tabled, because guess what? Bill's cell phone starts ringing. Heh. He leaves the room to talk, we know not to whom. As soon as he's gone, Roman fires Adaleen as his barber and orders Nicki to take over. He wants to know what's really going on, since it's clear that everyone's lying to him. "Everyone" meaning "Bill." "I only know what I've read," Nicki demurs. Roman reminds her of the condition he put on her marrying Bill. "You promised to respect my authority, remember? Bring me your cell phone. Now." Nicki's divided loyalties do battle for a moment before she finally says, "Behave yourself, Papa. We're not on the compound." Roman bares his throat for her and remarks, "You have such steady hands. If only you'd been a boy." Leaving aside the fact that Roman pretty much just dared her to kill him, think for a moment about that alternate universe. Alby wouldn't be the one running Juniper Creek right now, that's for damn sure.

Sarah's over at Scott's place, her Ben-following duties presumably discharged. She and Scott are making out on his bed. And it looks like Sarah's ready to go all the way. "I'm letting go of all of it," Sarah declares, which is certainly a healthy reason to give up your virginity (if not an uncommon one). Scott stops a couple of times to make sure she wants this, and she insists that she's ready. Less talky, more fucky. The Cowboy Junkies' version of "Sweet Jane" comes out into the open, and so do Sarah's girls.

Bill gets another cell phone call, and this time it's Alby, gloating about the fact that the UEB board just voted him chairman. "What do you want?" Bill growls at him, his always-charming method of admitting defeat. Alby says he wants the big McGuffin of the season: Weber Gaming.

After Bill hangs up, he sees Nicki and Barb standing there nervously, waiting to talk to him. Nicki says, "If Alby becomes the Prophet there will be eight thousand people that will kill for him. Everything you've done has pushed the compound into his arms!" Bill says that he knows what he's doing, and, okay, there's a first time for everything. Nicki bitches, "I have lost everything I hold dear to be a member of this family. Why don't you give up something for a change?" Well, he never gets to hunt or fish anymore. After Nicki leaves, Barb takes a turn, saying that Bill is only out for revenge against Roman. Bill calls Roman "the face of evil," which is kind of jarring after a season in which Roman was mostly the lesser of two. Will Barb succeed where Don failed?

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Big Love

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