Big Love
Roberta's Funeral

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B- | Grade It Now!
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Death Be Not Proud...

Nicki: There's been something I've been meaning to tell you. I was wrong about Bill.
Barb: Wrong?
Nicki: He's not seeing a fourth [wife].
Barb: Oh, I never thought he was. What gave you that idea anyway?
Nicki: Oh, little things. He wasn't where he said he'd be, leaving the house at odd hours. And it turns out I just had my signals crossed.
Barb: Well. That's easy to do.

Which, when filtered for passive-aggressiveness, comes out to this:

Nicki: By the way, I'm on to you and Bill.
Barb: You think so, Laura Evil Wilder?
Nicki: Yeah, more or less confirmed it, Boss Lady.
Barb: With what evidence, Agatha Nicki?
Nicki: A little thing I like to call star-sixty-nine. Plus your kids squealed.
Barb: It's all circumstantial, I'm not apologizing for it, and I don't plan to quit.

And then we find out that Nicki's coital instructions to Bill were a dry run (so to speak), as she's secretly taking birth control pills. I'd say she's trying to lure Bill into her web via sex, but given how cool he is toward her compared to the other two, that ploy seems really sad and misguided.

Back on the Juniper Creek compound, Bill drives up. In the background, we see that the meek women of the cult are getting ready to inherit the earth in the next life by grubbing in dirt in this one. As Bill drives up, two ginormous trucks with floodlights follow him. Is there any more obvious a penile stand-in than a big pick-up truck? (This is why I can't watch that asinine Ford commercial where Toby Keith is all, "Watch me lay my giant, engorged, manly 'truck frame' on this here table. Where's yours? Whip it out!" without snickering uncontrollably.) Bill stops, Alby's henchmen get out, and Bill says, "I'll say hello to my mother, if that's all right with you."

He heads inside and Lois gives him a warm, affectionate greeting. Bill's brought his mother a present -- a little TV set -- and tells her cheerily that he needs to look into getting her a little satellite dish too. Bill then takes advantage of Lois's good mood to tell her that he'll be staying with Joey and attending Roberta's funeral. Lois goes from zero to 60 in six seconds, snapping, "What for?" Bill stolidly replies that it's the right thing to do. Lois stalks off and sighs before saying, "[She] let your father walk all over her. Never a word against him, no matter what horrible thing he did. She'd lay down and let him wipe his feet on her back." It's always fun when one parent's trash-talking another to the kids! Bill says forcefully, "You taught us to love her." Lois recognizes she's defeated, so she turns to the TV, telling Bill to set it up for her.

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Big Love

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